Sideswipe: September 24: Spring has sprung ...

A reader writes: "Twin Suffolk cross born on Monday shown here 10 minutes old. Yellow guy is named Baaaaaanana and his sister is yet to be named. This colouring is a sign most times of a difficult birth. Helensville Mom looks pretty pleased."

An analogy for a pandemic

"I'm not sure the harbour bridge is even real anyway," reckons this Reddit poster. "It's about time the government stopped this silly bridge shutdown and allowed us all to get back on with our lives. Look, I know the experts are saying "it's not safe" and "the bridge might collapse and kill everyone on it", but what about the small business owners that need the bridge open so they can commute to work? Ok, so maybe some people will die, but they probably would have died in car accidents anyway. How can we know their deaths are actually due to the collapsing bridge and not because their car failed a warrant in 2016? They were going to die anyway. Something was going to get them, it just happens to be this.There's no need for bridge panic. These are tough, uncertain days, but they're still early days. Holding your nerve is a skill, hopefully not missing in this government. It's the small business owners (and farmers) that will help get our economy back on track, so this government needs to do everything they can to support them.

Didn't she star in Stranger Things?

Wifeless man does own laundry

A domesticated husband writes: "Our house backs on to a primary school. Along the fence line on the school side are climbable trees, so I often have conversations with the children.  Recently, I was hanging out the washing when a young lady up a tree spoke. "Hello," she said."Hello. How are you?" I said back. "Do you have a wife?" she asked. Unfortunately, the bell went summoning her back to class, so a chance to discuss the position of wives was missed."

Lipstick nostalgia

Denise de Groot writes: "Reading "The Lipstick Revolution" in today's Sideswipe reminded me of Tangee lipsticks which were orange in the tube but changed colour on lips when applied. They were inexpensive and popular with young teenagers such as I was about 60 years ago. The more applied, the brighter the pink. Developed in the 1920s, they are still manufactured and available online."

Why is saffron so expensive?

It takes approximately 75,000 flowers, which need to be plucked by hand, to make one pound of Saffron. This is why the spice is so expensive.