Jim Arrowsmith of Campbells Bay has been watching the UK comedy Man Down on Netflix. "Yesterday something disturbing happened," he says. "The mother of protagonist Dan shows him a tiny blue jumper she has knitted for his impending baby, when his mum says she didn't know what the baby's name was, so she picked one."
Magnificent monikers
1. "I have a photo at home of a truck in Wairoa, with the proprietor's name painted on the side: A. Rough — panelbeater."
2. "One of my former students contemplated a degree in mechanical engineering. Her name was Cara Prentiss."
3. "My vasectomy was done by an Auckland surgeon by the name of de Castro! I kid you not. I am not able to reproduce but happily, I'm not a eunuch either!"
4. "Many moons ago my sister, Margaret Hand, was going out with John Foote."
5. "The head of the canteen at the school I was at was called Mrs Stew. The best bit was her first name of Iris."
6. "Through the 70s to 80s a Mr Swigg owned a hotel and bar in Ohaeawai in the north."
7. "In the 1972-1975 Labour Government the Minister of Mines was Mr Colman and the Minister of Electricity was Mr Watt."
8. "Our neighbour who is a fireman is called Bernie."
9. "A good friend of mine had a primary school teacher named Mrs Fish, whose husband worked in the marine department."
10. "My wife was kind enough to book me in for a vasectomy. The only enjoyable part of the experience was the laugh I got when I found out his name was Dr Sacks."
Mow schedule not cutting it
"The grass is so long on the Pigeon Mt Reserve the footpath is nearly covered and the local kindergarten's bin is swallowed by the long grass," writes Lucy. "Cutting once every three months isn't really cutting it."
Gun jewellery grounded
A former police officer had her tiny gun charm necklace confiscated at Stansted Airport because it was "too dangerous" and passengers might think it was real. Claire Sharp's late husband gave her the 2.5cm piece because of their love of target shooting.
A senior security staff member confiscated the necklace, saying it was an imitation firearm. "I've worn that necklace through security at Westminster Abbey to go to the Metropolitan Police Christmas carol service and have been there alongside dignitaries, high-ranking police officers and the Home Secretary ... with no problem whatsoever," Sharp told the Daily Mail.
The CAA rules state "any item that resembles a firearm in any way, whether capable of firing a projectile or not, is prohibited" and cannot even be taken in cabin luggage.
Quick links
1.Choose all the products you have been exposed to in the past month and this story will tell you how much poison you have in your system…
