Sideswipe: March 7: Hilarious handles

1. "These were the choices (pictured) I was given for a urologist in London a couple of years ago," writes Gray Milmine. "Unfortunately some have moved on to other hospitals now."

2. "In the early 1970s I had friends who lived in a Somerset village where the Post Office was run by Mr and Mrs Stamp. They had a daughter called Penny. If you don't get that, consider yourself young."

3. "I was a Plunket nurse in the 80s and my nurse manager's name was Mrs Babe."

4. "In Whangarei over 50 years ago, there was a legal firm called — Grabham, Oldham and Upham."

5. "I once went to see a doctor called Dr Poorly."

6. "A bit cheeky but, years ago I got a speeding ticket from a cop called Officer Trotter ... "

7. "There is a rest home in the UK called Filgrave Rest Home. It is in the village of Filgrave, but it seems a tiny bit insensitive ... "

8. "I recall that in the late 1950s I attended a school in Manchester, England where three science teachers were named Mr Little, Mr Moore and Mr Allott."

9. "I also had a distant cousin with the surname Long, who wanted to call their newborn son Miles, until they thought it through a bit."

10. "The school I teach at used to have a Mrs Yelling and a Mrs A. Busing."

News nostalgia

1. In July 1979 the Concrete Pipe Corporation in Wisconsin decided to elect Jesus Christ as the new chairman of their board. The decision was unanimous. When asked what address they were going to supply for the new chairman, the company president, Don Koepke, explained, "We'll say, 'wherever two or more are gathered in his name'." The company survived for about another eight years under His leadership.

2. Back in 1967, a mail-order company of New Jersey wasn't selling many of its sandals, until it came up with the idea of advertising them as "captured" Vietcong slipper sandals ... the fine print revealed it was simply the design of the sandals that had been captured, not the actual sandals. And even so, not really, because they had been selling the same sandals for years. The company later reported that it was the most successful ad they had ever run, and that the sandals sold "like mad".

The latest from the Coromandel police blotter.