Cereal offender spotted in New Lynn.
Embarrassment and regret
1. "I was staying at a nice hotel in North Wales while travelling for work. They had a great pool. I went in one morning and started messing about, recreating the opening scene of Jaws, then engaged in lots of splashing like the shark had come back for the second go. Then I tried a bit of synchro, kicking my legs up in various shapes. Then I did a bit of goalkeeper practice by throwing my goggles and diving to catch them. Then I saw a window overlooking the pool and a family of six people eating breakfast and watching me. I'm a 51-year-old man."
2. "When I was in primary school I called my crush and sang the Celine Dion song from Titanic on his answering machine. A few days later I'm sitting in front of him and his mother and she says, 'Oh so you're so and so; I love your voice'."
3. "I'm a professor of computer science but a few years ago I had never heard the term 'meme' spoken. During a lecture I kept referring to it as 'maemae' and everyone just had this confused look on their faces. At one point, a student piped up and said, 'do you mean 'meem'?"