Sideswipe: March 15: Divorced? Or married to Groot?

Divorced? Or married to Groot? Photo / Supplied

Happy bacteria day to you

You might reconsider your relationship with birthday cake after encountering a study titled: Bacterial Transfer Associated with Blowing Out Candles on a Birthday Cake. On average, blowing out the candles increased the amount of bacteria on the frosting by 14 times.

But in one case, it increased the amount of bacteria by more than 120 times. So the spittle-borne bacteria transfer varies hugely. The study author, Paul Dawson, concludes that it's not really a big deal, claiming our mouths are teeming with bacteria, most of them not harmful.

Dawson has also heard from people with germ-proofing the birthday candle blowing process. A patent, for example, exists for a "Sanitary birthday cake cover and candle system," consisting of a cake holder and cover with holes for candles. (Source: The Atlantic)

Hairy hotel mural ... in the breakfast area. Photo / Supplied

That time you realised you have been doing something wrong for years ...

1. "I was the director of IT for a very large company. I was given a new cellphone and told to set up my voicemail. I don't know that when I recorded my name it would be played to whoever I leave a voice mail for. Well the name I recorded was, "Dooder84 Corporate IT Godddd!!!" I worked there for four years until someone in the hallway referred to me as the "corporate IT GoD!" I was so embarrassed ... "

2. "My name is Ryan. My mum had told me my name was in the alphabet. She must've meant the letters to spell my name were in the alphabet, but nope it took that long to realise the alphabet didn't go "W, X, Ryan Z."

3. "Since the dawn of time, I would pick up the silverware and utensils out of their basket in the dishwasher and put them away in their drawers then go back and pick up more out of the dishwasher. Then one day I saw my wife lift the basket out of the dishwasher and I legit stood there with my mouth open."