We get it. The tomatoes are crushed. Photo / Supplied
Wedding fails
1. Went to a wedding on a farm. The ceremony was completely drowned out by the sound of a cow giving birth in the nearby shed.
2. I was best man at my friend's second wedding. I started my speech with "welcome back everyone". He was not happy.
3. I
went to a beach wedding. While the bride was walking down the aisle a flock of seagulls flew over the seated guests and one dropped a fish head on the mother of the bride.
(Via @Jimmyfallon)
Small World Stories
1. Simon writes: "I worked as a tour guide in Africa in the early 1990s and the remotest place I went was to see the mountain gorillas in the east of what is now the Democratic Republic of the Congo. The road was a muddy track and when it rained our progress could slow to hours per kilometre. We drove our truck to the end of the track and hiked up into the hills to a small, dark hut. I was speaking to some people already in the hut when a guy lying on the floor says my name: 'Simon Kay'. And it turns out the guy is Tom, an old classmate I haven't seen for 10 years."
2. About six years ago I took a trip to Evergreen Books, the book exchange shop in Devonport. Browsing the transport section I saw a copy of a Haynes workshop manual for an MGB. I used to own both the car and a manual but now, as the owner of an MGC, I thought this manual might complement my factory MGC manual.
