Sideswipe: July 05: Tucked away down south

Richard writes: "While driving between Glenorchy and the village of Paradise in Central Otago last Sunday I saw Kate and Wills enjoying a dirty weekend in a caravan on their own road to Paradise."

Time travel wasted on the young

George Pointon teaches 5-year-olds and asks them questions and shares their answers on Twitter. The latest is: "If you could time travel, where would you go?" Alice answered, "to after school". Pointon wrote: "She could go anywhere. I mean literally wherever, whenever (said Shakira). But Alice has decided to use this omnipotence to move 47 minutes into the future. I took it personally to be honest. My lessons aren't that bad." Jack had a whole other approach to the question. "Back in time REALLY far." By "REALLY far", Jack meant 1999. So he could do nothing but go swimming. Toby's answer, had a bit more depth. His was "Meet my mum as a baby". Yes. Brilliant. Perfectly sweet film storyline that's probably already been done but who cares. Or "selfless and kind" Emma, "Floremma Nightingale", who said she would "take medicine back to old times". Oh, my heart. Mikey simply answered "Breakfast". "Normally I use this platform to dismantle Mikey's answers," Pointon wrote. "Not today. He is staying at his Nana's and she made chocolate chip pancakes this morning with a banana milkshake. I can only agree with him. Forget seeing Plato or The Beatles. Nan's pancakes please." And just when you thought it was all sweet, light-hearted fun, Ravi chimed in with "See my Grandpa again". "Cue the tears and grab the tissues, because he said they played marbles together. MARBLES. Oof."

Chocolate river reality for Gloop

The reality of Augustus Gloop's (Michael Bollner) ill-fated slurping from Wonka's chocolate river was pretty unpleasant, according to Julie Dawn Cole (Veruca Salt): "Michael had to fall into this disgusting stuff that had been sitting there for three weeks. It had the lights on it, and people were emptying their coffee cup dregs into it…I remember watching that and being quite afraid for Michael because they were very adamant that, you know, "Not 6 inches to the left, not 6 inches to the right." Those were the shallow bits. There was a trough there that he could fall into. But, of course, you couldn't see that because the chocolatey water masked it. So he had to really be specific on where he was going to tumble and hit that spot. I remember being quite anxious for him."

How they advertise public transport in Denmark