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Home / Entertainment

Sideswipe February 6: Special delivery

Ana Samways
By Ana Samways
Sideswipe - ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz·NZ Herald·
5 Feb, 2023 04:00 PM2 mins to read

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Humour - it's all about the delivery. Photo / Supplied

Humour - it's all about the delivery. Photo / Supplied

Ana Samways
Opinion by Ana SamwaysLearn more

An inconvenient tooth

A man was shocked to find two human teeth embedded in his face days after accidentally colliding with another person during a basketball game. While trying to recover a rebound, the man collided with another player; at first, he thought the man’s chin had hit the left side of his head, right above the eye, but then he saw the other guy bleeding from his mouth and saying that he had lost two of his teeth.

While he went to wash the blood pouring from his wound, everyone else was busy looking for the other player’s teeth, but they were nowhere to be found. Six days after the accidental collision, he noticed a rancid smell coming out of the wound above his eye. Panicked that the cut had become infected, he rushed to the emergency room where doctors thoroughly checked the wound and extracted two chipped teeth.

We’ve always been distracted

“Believe me, this is not nourishing the mind with literature, but killing and burying it with the weight of things or, perhaps, tormenting it until, frenzied by so many matters, this mind can no longer taste anything, but stares longingly at everything, like Tantalus thirsting in the midst of water.” That was 14th century Italian scholar and poet Petrarch on the technology he thought was tormenting the human mind. What was it? Books.

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Toilet jokes right on cue

Toilet jokes right on cue. Photo / Supplied
Toilet jokes right on cue. Photo / Supplied

Did you know...

1. A new emergency service in Wales offers another way to quickly reach people in need of immediate medical attention. The Great North Air Ambulance Service, in addition to operating helicopters, now has a jet suit and paramedics trained in its use.

2. If humans last as long as the average mammalian species, and no mass extinctions or catastrophes occur, then 99.5 per cent of humans who will ever exist are yet to be born.

3. In 2017, the Indian Government instituted a new law banning the sale of alcohol within 500 metres of a highway. Some bars added mazes in front so that patrons had to travel at least 500 metres to get to the bar.

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