You had me at hero ... not
"I've received more than my share of spam emails, but today's effort from a supposed American soldier currently in Afghanistan on a UN peace-keeping mission took a fresh approach which kept me reading," writes Sharon Holt. "It turns out he had 'recovered some funds from a terrorist sect that staged a bomb blast at Afghanistan capital Kabul last week'. In a strange twist of fate, this soldier has turned to me for 'advice and assistance' as well as my 'most urgent and swift positive response'. I am at a loss to know how this pink-cardiganed, slightly forgetful but well-meaning woman in her late 50s could do more than offer a comfy chair, a plate of date scones and a hot brew. Perhaps he somehow got wind of my love of the TV drama series Homeland?"
Food for thought
The common phrase, "There ain't no such thing as a free lunch", which we all know to be true, came from the practice of saloons offering a free lunch to patrons buying at least one drink. Lunch consisted of salty finger-foods, encouraging the drinking of more beer. (The Russians say: "The only place you can get a free lunch is in mouse trap.")