Brought together by fate and bonded by grief, the Coast radio host and her new best friend have changed each other’s life. Photo / Michael Rooke
Beloved broadcaster Toni Street has always been a big believer in fate. Ever since she was young, she’s had the sense that someone or something beyond her control is looking over her. “It’s comforting to think of the world like that,” she says. “It helps me to try to make sense of things.”
So it’s no surprise that Toni believes fate had a hand to play when it came to her newfound close friendship with Auckland mum Sophia Perera, who won an on-air competition to join the Coast radio star on a Hawaiian holiday of a lifetime.
Sophia might have been drawn at random to join Toni and her breakfast co-hosts, Sam Wallace and Jason Reeves, on the luxury week away, but as soon as the radio stars heard her extraordinary story, it was clear they’d found someone very special indeed.
After losing her precious first-born daughter Valentina at age three in a tragic driveway accident in 2014, Sophia has been battling terminal cancer. As she revealed in a Woman’s Day story last year, she’s been through gruelling surgery and chemotherapy, and she’s now having immunotherapy treatment in the hope of extending her life.
“We were all crying when we heard what Sophia has been through,” admits Toni, who knows first-hand the heartbreaking reality of both grief and chronic illness. “It honestly felt like it was meant to be that we’d be put together like this. She deserved a boost so much and we really struck the jackpot because we all got on so well. We felt like a big extended family from the moment we met.”
Toni, 39, and Sophia, 46, are joined at our photoshoot by the broadcaster’s Coast co-stars Sam and Jase to reminisce about the amazing week they spent together, along with Sophia’s husband Cam Warren, 51, and their daughter Augustina, six.
The group met for the first time at the airport and hit it off immediately, setting the tone for a life-changing holiday. Helicopter trips, sun-drenched beach days, swimming, surfing, sunset cruises, shopping trips, dinners out and poolside cocktails made for a wonderful break – particularly for Sophia, who is determined to make the most of every opportunity amid the devastating reality of her cancer diagnosis.
The brave mum tells, “With my cancer journey, it’s about actively doing things that bring me joy. It’s incredibly important to me that I make memories with Augustina and Cam if I’m not around any more – and every day in Hawaii was incredible. It’s something we’ll all remember forever.”
It was at the end of 2020 that Sophia began experiencing stomach pains and bloating, before doctors found a stomach tumour. She immediately started chemotherapy, then underwent surgery, which removed the tumour.
But after six weeks in hospital, she was devastated when her symptoms resumed and another tumour was discovered. Doctors later confirmed she has follicular dendritic cell sarcoma, a rare, incurable illness.
While Sophia was given three to six months to live in April 2021, fortnightly immunotherapy infusions have so far kept the tumours at bay. Side effects of the immunotherapy drugs include rheumatoid arthritis and chronic fatigue. She also suffers tinnitus and hearing loss, but she’ll continue with the treatment for as long as it continues working.
“Even though part of me wants to be with my daughter in Heaven, I have to keep fighting for my daughter here,” explains Sophia. “She needs me more.”
Like Toni, Sophia believes there was perhaps a higher power at play when it came to the Hawaiian getaway. She smiles, “I did wonder whether Valentina might have had something to do with it because I said a little prayer to her the morning the winner was being announced. I like to think of Valentina being around me and sending signs. There are lots of little things – the colour purple, butterflies and angels – and it helps.”
Sophia firmly believes she got cancer because of the trauma of losing Valentina.
“My grief and pain sat in my stomach, and that’s where my tumour grew,” she says, adding that living under the shadow of cancer is an enormous burden.
She gets “scanxiety” – the ever-present fear that her regular scans might reveal further bad news. Once her immunotherapy stops working, there are currently no further treatment options.
“There’s that constant worry in the back of my mind,” tells Sophia. “Last week, I wasn’t feeling great. I had headaches and I was tired, which is how it all started for me before I knew I had cancer, so there’s that thing of always questioning myself and wondering what every feeling means.”
Toni says she and Sophia shared many deep and meaningful conversations in Hawaii. Having lost three siblings – her twin brother Lance from cancer at 18 months old, her newborn sister Tracy a year later and 14-year-old brother Stephen in a farm accident in 2002 – she has an innate understanding of grief and loss.
Mum-of-three Toni has also survived a life-threatening illness, Churg-Strauss syndrome, the autoimmune condition that left her fighting for her life after the birth of her second child Mackenzie in 2015. It’s these shared experiences that the women say have brought them close.
“We had lots of chats and were really able to open up to each other,” reveals Toni, who describes grief as an “invisible cloak” around her shoulders. “It’s like a heaviness that’s always there. When you meet someone who has been through tragedies too, you have that instant connection – and that’s what it’s been like with Sophia.
“Her attitude is incredible. This is a woman who has experienced the absolute worst kind of pain in losing a child and now an unimaginable cancer diagnosis, yet she won’t let life’s cruel knocks dampen her spirit and that is utterly inspiring. Meeting someone like Sophia changes your life because it reminds you of the importance of living each day to the fullest.”
Sophia is grateful to Toni for opening up about her own family’s losses, which in turn allowed her to share her feelings and release some of the strain. “I feel raw and vulnerable when I share my story, and I can’t help but feel like I might be judged. But there was none of that with Toni. It felt like we’d known each other for years.”
Sam and Jason were also touched by Sophia’s incredible spirit. Both were moved to tears by what she and Cam have been through, but they say their trip with the inspiring couple has taught them huge life lessons.
“Spending time with Sophia reminded me what’s really important in life,” says Jase, 46, who is dad to Max, nine, and Olly, seven. “She embraced every opportunity to really soak up each moment. She smiled, she laughed, she hugged her little girl and she held her husband’s hand. She truly realises how precious each day is.”
And Sam – who is dad to three-year-old Brando, plus 20-month-old twins Cosette and Sienna – says going on holiday with Sophia, Cam and Augustina was life-changing. He admits being a parent to three under three is exhausting, but he’s determined not to take any of it for granted.
“I say that having twins is the hardest thing that’s ever happened to me, but also the biggest blessing. And being with Sophia is just such a powerful reminder to cherish the people you love and enjoy every second of life. She’s a shining example of someone who knows how to make the most of every moment.”
At 2.30pm there will be a party in Aotea Square “filled with festive Christmas music and dance including the Bluey Live Christmas Experience.
Video / NZ Herald