A cancer diagnosis brought the broadcaster and her best friend even closer. Photo / Woman's Weekly
A cancer diagnosis brought the broadcaster and her best friend even closer. Photo / Woman's Weekly
Becoming a parent is one of life’s biggest challenges – with sleepless nights and constant worry, it can be exhausting.
And while Newstalk ZB host Francesca Rudkin certainly hasn’t escaped any of those pitfalls, creating her village with her best friend Louise Ayrey has made the joy of parenting much easier to find.
“As soon as anything new pops up, I immediately call Lou and ask, ‘Is this normal?’ You always need someone whose kids are a couple of years older than yours to reassure you,” Rudkin laughs.
“Our friendship is one of those relationships that comes along and you’ve got to treasure and look after, and never take for granted.”
Rudkin, 50, and Ayrey, 51, met 13 years ago when their kids became fast friends at kindergarten. As they met up for playdates, they realised it wasn’t just their children who shared a kinship. Both are avid runners, and when they survived the 100km Oxfam challenge together, they knew this would be a friendship for life.
Rudkin shares Oscar, 16, and Lola, 14, with her partner Tim, 52, and Ayrey shares kids Ted, 19, Mae, 16, and Henry, 14, with her partner Pete, 54. Together with their families, the pair have been through everything from navigating motherhood to the grief of losing family and even a cancer battle. But each hurdle has only served to make their friendship stronger.
In 2016, Ayrey was diagnosed with an aggressive form of breast cancer. When she went in for an ultrasound to have the diagnosis confirmed, it was Rutkin who watched her children and from that moment on, the former TV host was by her side every step of the way.
“Our family couldn’t have made it through without her,” enthuses Ayrey. “Lots of people came to support me, but Francesca was there for all of it. Not only for me, but also my kids.”
Ayrey regularly calls Rudkin the “producer of her life”, and never was the role more evident than during the six months she spent going through surgery and chemo.
Rudkin did everything, from accompanying Ayrey to appointments and watching her kids, to temporarily taking over her job as a project manager at the University of Auckland so she could have more time to recover after her mastectomy.
Ayrey shares, “She was amazing at gathering people and managing the information. My kids were in primary school and I didn’t want to have to deal with gossip, so she took care of it. But the big thing is how patient she was. Francesca never lost her cool with me and never told me I had to be hopeful.”
Francesca and Louise in Paparoa in November 2022. Photo / supplied
Though she was doing everything she could to help, Rudkin admits it was difficult watching her friend go through treatment, not knowing what the outcome would be.
“As much as I knew my support was important, I also felt pretty useless because there’s nothing you can do to affect the most important thing, which is the outcome.”
Happily, after an agonising few months of not knowing if the treatment would work, Ayrey was given the all-clear by her doctors and has been cancer-free since.
Understandably, it prompted a health kick in her life and in the years since, Ayrey has spent a lot of time listening to women’s health podcasts, searching for information. But she confesses she quickly grew frustrated as many presented the same old narratives – pushing weight loss or anti-ageing tips rather than practical advice for how to live a healthy life.
“We’re going to be fit, old, healthy ladies still hanging out together, still laughing and still running marathons!” Photo / supplied
When Ayrey mentioned to Rudkin they start their own health podcast, she never imagined it would actually go anywhere. “Much to Louise’s surprise, I went off and got it sorted,” tells Rudkin
In each episode of their new podcast The Little Things, the pair focus on a different area of women’s health, from menopause to nutrition and how to keep your relationship healthy, and both women have been stunned by how uninformed they were.
“What amazed me about doing the podcast is I’m 50 and I didn’t know a lot of this information,” confesses Rudkin. “I didn’t even know there was a thing called perimenopause until I got to 47.
“There are a whole lot of women out there who if they knew what perimenopause was would realise they’re not going crazy. It makes me think about what I need to talk to my daughter about as she grows up.”
Ayrey adds with a laugh, “There are a few girls at my daughter’s school who said, ‘My mum’s making me listen to your podcast so I know what she’s going through.’”
Now, thanks to the experts who have joined them on their adventure, Louise boldly declares, “We’re going to be fit, old, healthy ladies still hanging out together, still laughing and still running marathons!”
“Our friendship is one of those relationships that comes along and you’ve got to treasure and look after, and never take for granted.” Photo / Woman's Weekly
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