Out-the-gate comments during intimacy week have sent some relationships into a tailspin on Married At First Sight Australia, with crude oral sex references and words from the ghost of participants’ past leaving one groom facing the lion’s den.
While belittling teacher Jake may have stormed off the show for good in a huff last week, his essence still lingered in the form of a cringeworthy outburst from Ryan in the middle of expert Alessandra Rampolla’s feedback session.
Still reeling from the initial shock, the men could only watch like stunned mullets when Ryan doubled down and said his wife “gives awesome ****** [implied to be ‘head’]”.
Rampolla, who had encouraged Jacqui to get Ryan to fulfil her intimate fantasies, quickly reminded the self-proclaimed “warrior” that it wasn’t about him, but as with most things it seemed to fly over his head.
It’s safe to say things haven’t exactly been sunshine and daisies in the Jacqui and Ryan household thus far.
The high-standards bride previously chastised her groom for his poor performance during their “ultimate fantasy challenge”.
Billy gasped at Ryan's slip of the tongue. Photo / Nine AU
“The crux is that Ryan just doesn’t listen,” she said, lamenting the fact that she was “actually spending the time trying to train him” to be a better partner.
“I’m not here to fix you,” Ryan retorts during one of many arguments. I wouldn’t be surprised if this pair is the next to leave the experiment.
Actually, on second thoughts, it could be Tony and Morena who are headed for a breakup after a communication spat resulted in the groom leaving the apartment for some time away.
The groom is consistently frustrated that he can’t get a word in with his new wife without being lectured, leading him to broach the subject, leave to clear his head, and receive a fiery response.
“When someone storms off and tells me to stop talking, it doesn’t sit well with me. I didn’t ask for a child,” Morena tells the camera.
Tony needed some time away from Morena. Photo / Nine AU
In the words of the narrator, a crisis was also unravelling at Awhina and Adrian’s apartment, and it was about who took out the bins and Adrian’s lack of effort.
“Once again, he leaves and the bin needs emptying. I need a new husband,” Awhina said with exasperation.
I should note that besides these outbursts, it’s been relatively (I say relatively) smooth sailing for most of the other couples in the experiment.
Jamie and Dave left little to the imagination when they described their intimate night together, with Jamie also revealing she had sex in a zoo toilet in a candid couples' Q&A.
The fallout from Billy and Sierah’s awkward massage wasn’t too serious, with Billy committed to building intimacy without jumping the gun.
“I’m human with human needs, and he’s hot and I’d like to have him on top of me,” Sierah frankly admitted.
Rhi and Jeff shared a cheeky kiss, cementing their leaving of the friend zone, and Paul and Carina are on cloud nine (as per usual).
The real challenge will come at the next dinner party, where we eagerly await to see if Jacqui finds out about her husband’s comments and if Tony will try to stick it out with Morena.
“Intimacy week has started off with a bang, hasn’t it?” Jamie tells the camera. That’s an understatement.
Mitchell Hageman joined the Herald’s entertainment and lifestyle team in 2024 and has taken on the unofficial role of Mafs correspondent for this season. He previously worked as a multimedia journalist for Hawke’s Bay Today.
