Madonna and Jesus to 'wed' in Kabbalah service

Madonna and her Brazilian toyboy lover Jesus Luz are set to tie the knot in a Kabbalah "commitment ceremony", according to Luz's father. Photo / AP

Madonna

and her Brazilian toyboy lover

Jesus Luz

are set to tie the knot in a Kabbalah "commitment ceremony", according to Luz's father.

In a recent interview with Brazil's

Quem (Who)

magazine,

Luiz Heitor Pinto da Luz

announces that his model son, 22, is "extremely happy" since he

hooked up with Madge

, 50, and is definitely planning some kind of religious ritual to cement their love, but it won't be a wedding.

"The Kabbalah ceremony in New York that will link up my son Jesus Luz and Madonna only confirms that he is extremely happy.

"I don't know if there will, in fact, be a real marriage between Madonna and my son.

"It will be a type of ritual, but I do not know Kabbalah or if the ceremony will have legal validity," he told the magazine.

He adds that his son is

having a whale of a time with Madge and her three kids

, 12-year-old Lourdes, Rocco, eight, and adopted tot David Banda, three.

"She has young children and he helps out with them," he said.

"My son is charismatic, he likes children, he has an excellent relationship with her children. He plays football with them."

She's so feminine...

Dad has also fallen for the charms of Lady Madonna.

"I've spoken by phone with Madonna - in French, because my English is not fluent - and she appears to me to be a normal and polite person. She is feminine. I don't feel she is a harsh person," he adds.

Madonna, feminine? Behave yourself.

Earlier this week it was reported that Madge was subsidising her stallion's education by forking out $1,000 a week for English lessons for him. Cobblers, says dad.

"Those stories are lies, made up when the press have no information. He already spoke English long before meeting her, when he lived with an aunt in the US."

Dad also fiercely rejects claims that his son is only with the Material Girl because of her money. He's really in L.O.V.E. and hasn't been seduced by all that money and glamour.

"Obviously, he likes what is good, but he is not one to be impressed by materialism," said Heitor.

This is the way...

Luz has been spotted joining Madge at Kabbalah meetings in New York for months; prompting speculation that the evangelically raised model is converting to the branch of Judaism.

And despite rumours that Madge had pulled the plug on their relationship to appease the baby Gods (word was she ditched Luz before flying to Malawi to scoop three-year-old Mercy James) who wagged a disapproving finger at her saucy affair, they remained a hot item.

Snitches close to the singer say Madge returned to New York after her failed adoption bid and has kept Luz as a constant companion.

A snitch said: "They are totally besotted with each other and he's really helped Madonna through this tough time.

"It wasn't that the relationship went off the boil, it was more a matter of Madonna wanting to concentrate on her adoption bid of Mercy and they wanted to keep a low profile while that became the main focus.

"Madonna was devastated when the adoption was rejected the first time but now she wants to lavish some attention on Jesus and she's keen to make sure they have a solid relationship for all the children's sakes."

Read: Luz is a glorified babysitter.

"Lourdes mocks him by calling him The Babysitter, because he is so young. She likes him, but also likes winding him up."

See, Lourdes agrees.

Madonna and Luz first met on the set of

that saucy photo shoot

for

W

magazine back in December. And their naughty love has been the talk of the town since.

We're really not sure what to make of Madge and her little bit of the other with baby Jesus. We had them down as a Total Tabloid Fairytale, but how wide off the mark we were. Just look at them, the saucy devils, they're obviously

besotted with one another

(we know, total sensory depravation. You're welcome) and steaming ahead with a

genuine romance anchored with all the deep and meaningful stuff.

But even if it all goes Kabbalahahahaha with her Brazilian stud, maneater Madge need not suffer the indignity of a dry spell and declare her lovelife a flatliner. We've got

just the guy for her.

Just imagine, it could be the

'poison Penns'

all over again. Happy days.

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Pictured: Madonna. Photo / AP

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