KEY POINTS:
Wanganui Mayor Michael Laws was booted off TV One's Dancing with the Stars last night after scoring a measly nine points out of a possible 40 from the judges.
He started his jive routine with confidence, donning a pair of sunglasses and slicking his hair back with a comb.
But the judges and the show's viewers - whose votes count for 50 per cent - didn't buy any of it.
Judge Craig Revel-Horwood described Laws' dancing as "stompy and shambolic".
And he said the timing was appalling.
"It lacked any form of control. The best part was when you ripped [partner Lauren de Boeck's] skirt off."
Judge Carol-Ann Hickmore was slightly more sympathetic, saying she loved his energy and enthusiasm. "But I'm sorry - that was not a jive," she added.
Laws described the difficulty he had had taking instructions from his dance partner during rehearsals. "The Prime Minister of New Zealand couldn't tell me what to do. Taking instructions from a dance instructor is a big step for me," the ex-MP said.
Laws' hips seemed a little looser than in previous weeks and he even managed a couple of high kicks. However, his mouth continued to open and close in an unsightly manner throughout the whole dance.
Former All Black Frank Bunce, who performed the tango, was relegated to the "bottom two" - the lowest scoring pair - alongside Laws, despite scoring 27 points from the judges. The former hard man of rugby, who was wearing a pink tie, confessed to having his chest waxed and applying mascara to his greying hair for the show.
TV celebrity and former Silver Fern April Ieremia was the show's first casualty when she was voted off last week.
Actress Greer Robson scored a respectable 19 from the judges for her tango.
Broadcaster Paul Holmes managed to pull in 15 points for his tango, but not without some harsh words from the judges.
Judge Brendan Cole described his dancing as "a little desperate" and Revel-Horwood said "the whole thing was lame, limp and completely lacklustre".
Infomercial queen Suzanne Paul pulled in the highest score with 32 points for her jive, and singer and NZ Idol judge Megan Alatini pulled in 30 points for her tango.
Former Tall Black Brendon Pongia scored 24 points. But he couldn't escape the sharp tongue of Revel-Horwood, who said his feet stuck out like learner plates. "It wasn't your best, I'm afraid."
Rankin The Stars
… from Christine Rankin, the former Work and Income NZ chief who became the first casualty of last year's show.
Best performance?
Suzanne Paul. She's doing brilliantly and moves so well and loves every minute of it and puts her heart and soul into it. She's a lot older than the others and I just love it. I do think the pressure is starting to show a bit on some of their faces.
Biggest embarrassment?
He's not an embarrassment, but I don't think Frank Bunce can dance. It's that "keep an All Black in there". I don't get it at all. He was as stiff as a board, and he was as stiff as a board last week. Krystal [Stuart] looked so disappointed a lot of the time. It's like the judges are trying to keep him in there and I don't think the public are silly. He didn't deserve 27.
Hottest looking?
I think Suzanne looked hot. I think she looked fantastic. Brendon [Pongia] is the hottest looking guy without a doubt.
Trickiest dance move?
Suzanne's whole routine. She moved across that floor like dynamite. Some of the things she did were just so skilled. It's as though she's been dancing for years.
Best judge's comment?
Alison Leonard said to Michael Laws he was like a car wreck. It was awful but it was fascinating and you couldn't help watching.
Right decision?
Frank Bunce should have gone. Poor old Michael. I think he was the most entertaining by a million miles. The real entertainment has gone. People like Frank are getting such ridiculously high scores for no good reason.
