.. and from there, she gave her 51 million followers an at-times explicit rundown of what's happened on holiday. Here's how a Kardashian birthday party goes down, from Kim's perspective:
"Kourtney Kardashian threw up in her bed 4 times and slept in it."
Celebrity stylist Jen Atkin "spiked my Oreo shake to try to get me to not eat it because she's fat shaming me."
Beauty writer Sarah Howard "tweaked her neck twerking."
Model and socialite Britt Gastineau "skinny dipped solo and then disappeared for the two days."
NBA wife and socialite Larsa Pippen "tried to give me a 'special' brownie and I threatened to sue her & the chef."
Kourtney Kardashian "won't stop doing naked cart wheels."
@jOYCEBONELLi put nipple clamps on @ForeverMalika."
And then there were the pictures - out-of-focus snaps including this one, of the partygoers brandishing an enormous inflatable penis:
And this twerk-disaster of a video:
Kourtney confirmed her little sister's reports, specifically the part about throwing up four times in bed and then sleeping in it (Note: Surely if you're as rich as a Kardashian, you can afford not to sleep in a puddle of your own spew).
And as for Kim? What scandalous behaviour did she get up to?