OPINION:
Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice, shame on you. Fool me three times, then you must be George Lucas because his Star Wars prequel trilogy left me feeling quite the fool back in the early aughts.
If you didn't live through them I can't overstate how immensely disappointing those three films actually were. It's hard to imagine now with Disney regularly dropping shows and movies set in the famous galaxy far, far away, but when The Phantom Menace came out back in 1999 there hadn't been any new Star Wars since 1983's Return of the Jedi.
It wasn't just a big deal, it was a galaxy-sized deal. Some friends and I all took the day off work to go and see it the day it was released. Almost immediately we sensed something wasn't right and just over two hours later we walked out, not mad, just hugely disappointed.
This pattern repeated itself for the following two films, 2002's Attack of the Clones and 2005's Revenge of the Sith. Each time I entered the cinema I was hyped. Each time I left bitterly disappointed.
In recent years there have been attempts to rewrite history and frame them as "good movies," but in actuality, there are only two good things about them.
The first is when they ended. That's not snark, it's fact. The ending of Attack of the Clones, as great mechanised battle erupted all around Yoda as he flew off in an army transport while gravely intoning "begun, the Clone Wars has" before the credits rolled, was awesome. It was so cool it shunted out all the disappointment provided by the rest of the film.
However, the concluding chapter dashed all those dreams by disappointingly starting with the finish of said Clone Wars. Again, the movie wobbled between average and poor until right at the end when, after a protracted, needlessly long lightsaber duel, we finally arrived at a moment that almost redeemed the whole trilogy.
In the duel's final seconds, Ewan McGregor's character Obi-Wan engages in some limb-lopping lightsaber work that renders his former student turned evil monster Anakin Skywalker completely immobile. From his vantage point on the high ground a distraught Obi-Wan cries: "You were my brother Anakin. I loved you."
As flames begin to dance across Anakin's downed, limbless body, he looks up with a look of pure disgust in his wild eyes and snarls: "I hate you". Actor Hayden Christensen copped a lot of flak for his George Lucas mandated wooden delivery, but in that scene he's electrifying, leaving you with no doubt that he means it, man.
This moment between the two characters bristles with raw emotion and spine-chilling feels. For the first time in the whole prequel trilogy, Star Wars actually felt alive.
Of course, Lucas ruined it almost immediately in the next scene with a clunky Darth Vader reveal that saw one of cinema's greatest badasses lurching around like Frankenstein's monster wailing "Noooooooooooooo" in the most exaggerated hammy way possible.
Disappointing? You betcha.
So, that near-final 90 seconds was the first good thing about the prequel trilogy. The second good thing was McGregor's portrayal of Obi-Wan. He captured the essence of the character's original actor, British screen legend Sir Alec Guinness, and imbued it with his own charm, best illustrated by his chirpy catchphrase "Hello, there!", which he beamed whenever he got the jump on his enemies.
While there was a substantial amount of fan gripes after the recent sequel trilogy, I mostly enjoyed them. They had their faults, sure, but at least they captured the feel of Star Wars. The prequel movies just didn't.
But, that could be about to change. Yesterday, Disney+ released the trailer for the long-talked-about Obi-Wan Kenobi series which begins streaming on May 25. The six-part show is set 10 years after Obi-Wan left Anakin to burn and follows him as he skulks about on the desert planet Tatooine in hiding.
"The key to hunting Jedi is patience," a black-clad, menacingly pasty-faced villain named Fifth Brother seethes, as footage of townsfolk being intimidated, stormtroopers marching, and some poor soul hanging plays out. "Jedi can not help what they are. Their compassion leaves a trail."
Amongst the very cool stuff, a neon-drenched city, aggressive new baddies, and just seeing McGregor back in the role, there are lots of hints and details to nerd over; does the blaster shown in silhouette belong to Han Solo? Sure looks like it. Is that Vader's black glove? Probably, Christensen is confirmed as starring in the show. Does the rousing Duel of the Fates score that plays in the back half signal the reappearance of Obi-Wan's old, long-defeated foe Darth Maul? Very possibly.
Just like in those early years of the new millennium, I am once again hyped for a prequel. A strange feeling indeed after carrying their disappointment for so many years. I can't help but find myself relating to the words that splice up the trailer's action scenes.
"Between darkness and defeat," they read. "Hope survives."
Robyn Malcolm's acclaimed TV drama is to air in the UK.