<i>Blogger Bites Back:</i> Sarah Ferguson told to make herself scarce

Herald online

28 Apr, 2011 11:42 PM6 mins to read

As anticipation of

Kate Middleton

and

Prince William

's nuptials reaches fever pitch, let's take a gander at what's buzzing around the proverbial water cooler.

All met with the royal seal of approval, naturally...

Do one, Fergie!

Ouch: If not being invited to the wedding of the century wasn't bad enough, Sarah Ferguson, The Duchess of York, has also been told to make herself scarce on the big day.

According to

PopEater

, Fergie (persona non grata to the royal clan) and her tabloid-hugging exploits are under strict instructions to keep a low profile as Wills and Middleton tie the knot.

One of Fergie's pals explains: "The last thing the family wants is a picture of Sarah in a bikini on a beach popping up the day of the wedding or even worst mopping around by herself while everyone else is celebrating," says the pal. "They have basically told her to disappear and not be any distraction to the big day."

Charming.

The source adds: "Not inviting Sarah to the wedding is such a big mistake. "What's going to happen in a few years when her daughters get married?

"Are they going to try and ban their mother from attending their wedding because the Queen will be attending?

"If a wedding isn't a time for a family to set aside past problems and come together, then I don't know what is."

Fergie's ex-hubby

Prince Andrew

will be at the wedding, and so will daughters,

Beatrice

and

Eugenie

PopEater reports that Fergie could not be reached for comment. Yep, she's left the building. Can't blame her. Why stick around and have your nose rubbed in it?

Morrissey blasts Royal Wedding, family

Misery does love company: He once warbled that "the Queen is dead," so it's no great surprise that former Smiths frontman

Morrissey

has piped up and ripped into the royal family.

"Why would I watch the wedding? I couldn't take any of that seriously," he whined to BBC Radio 4 during an interview this week.

"I don't think the so-called Royal family speak for England now, and I don't think England needs them."

Lamenting the monarchy, he continued: "I do seriously believe that they are benefit scroungers, nothing else. I don't believe they serve any purpose whatsoever. I'm not an anarchist, but I believe that people don't want the Royal family - the so-called Royal family. They're not royal to me, but they're royal to the media for some reason.

"The press reports from Buckingham Palace tell you that people love them, but go out now and speak to people on the street and they will laugh at you. They really will."

Listen to a snippet of Morrissey's interview

here

But while Morrissey's on a downer about the royals, soccer stud

David Beckham

is very excited about the wedding, and wants you to be, too.

Beckham, who has been invited to the wedding, along with wife

Victoria

, has posted a Royal Wedding video message on his Facebook page.

"A Royal Wedding is amazing, it really is amazing," he says.

"Our country needs it. Our country wants it. The British public love the royal family.

"I was brought up around the royal family and around loving the royal family with my granddad, with my nan," he adds.

"I took my nan and granddad to Buckingham Palace when I got my OBE. They were so proud. It means so much to them. My granddad served his country and they were so proud of that.

"They brought me, my sisters, my mum up around the royal family and to see there is going to be one [a royal wedding] now is exciting."

Check out his message below:

Wedding vows?

Has Middleton accidentally revealed a snippet from her wedding vows?

According to Britain's

Daily Mail

, Middleton was snapped leaving her family home yesterday, with a piece of paper visible in the back seat of the car.

While many of the words were obscured, a portion of the text read: "With so much love within our hearts."

The

Mail

's deduction? Wills and Middleton have ditched convention and opted to write their own wedding vows. Either that or it's the tail-end of an amorous shopping list!

New portrait

William and bride-to-be Middleton are all teeth and smiles in a stunning new black-and-white portrait released today.

Shot by famed photographer

Mario Testino

, the picture shows the couple decked out in matching white shirts, and features in the pair's just-released wedding programme.

Check out the snap

here

The 28-page booklet, which was made available for download today, also includes a personal message from the couple.

"We are both so delighted that you are able to join us in celebrating what we hope will be one of the happiest days of our lives," their message reads. "The affection shown to us by so many people during our engagement has been incredibly moving, and has touched us deeply. We would like to take this opportunity to thank everyone most sincerely for their kindness."

The programme, including the Order of Service, can be downloaded from the

official Royal Wedding website

The night before...

Middleton is spending her last night as a single woman at the luxury five-star Goring Hotel, conveniently located just around the corner from Buckingham Palace.

The princess-in-waiting was snapped arriving at the venue dressed in a black and white spotted dress, with her parents Michael and Carole Middleton, along with sister Pippa and brother James.

She was greeted by a throng of screaming fans, hoping to catch a glimpse of her on what is likely to be the last public sighting of her before the wedding itself.

Watch a video of Middleton's arrival

here

Word is that a large canopy has been erected over the front of the 71-room hotel, as well as the pavement outside, blocking any snappers from sneaking a peek of Middleton as she emerges in her wedding dress.

Blogger's Briefs

Special royal wedding edition...

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and

Middleton

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Ellie Goulding

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