Ann Newbery selects the best of next week's festive TV viewing - so you don't have to.
In the lead-up to Christmas it's hard to get past the feeling that, as a discerning TV viewer, you've been relegated to Santa's naughty list. Surely the networks can't be subjecting us to yet another repeat of a Vicar of Dibley Christmas, celebrity chefs telling us what to do with leftover turkey, or festive movies designed for double-digit IQs? The answer is, sadly, yes they are.
At least the kids will be well entertained. TV2 has a daily collection of innocuous family films scheduled at noon in the countdown to the big day - though you might want to make sure the kiddies don't catch the tail-end of the often racy Tyra show that precedes it.
But if you're older, movies of mention next week include: Gremlins (TV2, noon today), stop-motion marvel Tim Burton's Corpse Bride (TV2, tonight at 11.15pm), beloved prison drama The Shawshank Redemption (TV One, Monday 8.30pm), the Adam Sandler/Drew Barrymore romcom The Wedding Singer (TV2, Monday 8.30pm), Whoopi Goldberg's Sister Act (TV2, Thursday 9.50pm), and the Sacha Baron Cohen sensation Borat (C4, Thursday at 9.45pm.)
CHRISTMAS EVE
If you're in need of a laugh - and at this time of year who isn't? - you could do worse than tune in to The Graham Norton Show's special Christmas episode on TV3 at 8.30pm, followed by a bumper version of the local panel show 7 Days of Christmas, at 9.30pm. Over on rival TV One, Dawn French is back battling to keep down brussel sprouts in a special episode of The Vicar Of Dibley at 8pm, followed by the possibly cringe-making New Zealand Variety Show at 9pm, and TV2 have scheduled the "Vince Vaughn is Santa's jealous brother" movie Fred Claus for primetime. As is their norm, Prime and C4 barely acknowledge the existence of Christmas in their line-ups.
CHRISTMAS DAY
It wouldn't be Christmas without a repeat of the 1939 movie The Wizard of Oz (TV One, 12.25pm) and the Queen's Christmas Message (just 10 minutes long from 7pm). On TV2, homegrown kids' show What Now? cooks up some treats for its two-hour Christmas special at 8.05am and follows up with numerous Christmas-related TV episodes of old sitcoms, as well as suitably festive movie repeats. In what could be considered a Christmas antidote though, TV2 has Sex And The City scheduled at 8.55pm, followed by National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation at 11.05pm. Switch over to TV3 and you have an unrecognisable Jim Carrey in The Grinch Who Stole Christmas at 7pm, followed by Tom Cruise in his iconic Top Gun role at 8.45pm. Maori Television, meanwhile, makes a respectable grab for audience attention with a Billy T Special featuring the late comedian's most famous hard-case sketches, including The News and The Traffic Cop, at 8.30pm.
