Tāme Iti is among this year's Celebrity Treasure Island cast. Photo / TVNZ
OPINION
Celebrity Treasure Island is back as we know and love it, with 18 lovable Kiwi legends battling it out to take home the cash prize for their charities.
Entertainment Editor Jenni Mortimer flew to Wānaka to meet the show’s competitors, cast her own judgments, and even bunker down for a night in camp.
So who is fighting it out on this season of Celebrity Treasure Island? Who is going to win? And who is the most surprising casting we’ve ever seen that had us screaming “mic drop”!
The Tea:The Bachelor NZ winnerGreen comes armed with some serious knowledge of the game. Husband Art has been in two seasons of the iconic game and his skills have been passed on to Matilda, who brings physical and mental strength in boatloads. She’s heard all the misconceptions, and she’s got a point to prove.
Who would you love to see on the other team? “Jacinda Ardern. But I don’t think she’s got time, haha.”
Predicted placing: 16th. The other team knows she’s got the skills and the intel, so she’s going to be targeted.
The Tea: Getting a read on Shortland Street alum Strang was tricky, he appeared like his head was in the game, but also like he might be a fly on the wall of it. But Strang admits he’s ready to give up his “creature comforts” and in fact, he’s quite pleased to be taken away from his post-lawn-mowing beer and sweet treats.
Do you have any phobias or fears? “I’m scared to share that with you because I’m scared that if I’ll last, they’ll put that in one of the challenges.”
Predicted placing: 14th. Sorry Blair, but yours/Rangi’s Shorty Street storylines remain in our hearts forever — minus the one where you slept with your sister.
Charity: Dementia Foundation
Courtney Dawson, comedian, 34
The Tea: The comedian may not know what she’s got herself into, but her resilience will see her figure this game out as she goes. She admits with a combination of “skill and honesty” she could take out the game. But the mum of one might need to be careful because this game is anything but honest.
Who will be your biggest competition in the game? “I think my biggest competition so far might be maybe Eli because Eli is funny and smart and charismatic, and I know that Eli is also really strong and fit.”
Predicted placing: 10th. I have no rationale, just a hunch.
Charity: Middlemore Foundation
Eli Matthewson, comedian, 34
The Tea: Lovable comedian Matthewson is an impressive, extremely likeable force who appeared to be the castaway with his head most in the game. He had already done his research, made transactions and filed away the receipts. He’s likely to market himself as the team player before cutting ties more brutally than he was cut from Dancing with the Stars.
Tell us whether you think you can win and why? “I think I can win. I’m puzzle smart. I think I’m more physically adept than people might think because I’m 5ft 7 but I actually have some capabilities.”
Predicted placing: 5th. He’s here for reality TV redemption.
Charity: Burnett Foundation Aotearoa
James Mustapic, comedian, 27
The Tea: My chat with the hilarious comedian spanned well over an hour and went off the record faster than Jordan Vandermade. He was serving tea so fine the Queen (RIP) would have approved. CTI superfan Mustapic does, however, admit it’s been a long time coming getting on the show. And now he’s here, he’s got the smarts and the humour to scheme his way into the merge and I can’t wait to watch.
Who is your biggest competition? “Old Stevey [Price] boy is a big unit — but he would be a good asset for me.”
Predicted placing: 8th. Buddy James with a physical powerhouse like big unit Steve and he’s going far.
The Tea: Make no mistakes, Lotto presenter and ex-decathlete Vandermade is here to win — and he bloody well could. The new dad admits he’s “the most competitive person on the planet”. We could absolutely see Vandermade pulling some dirty and highly entertaining moves to make his way to the finals and we would be rooting him on all the way.
What role do you think you’ll take on in camp? “Hype man. Positive outlook energy, definitely there for people to talk to but also hopefully there’s a little bit of that athletics still in these legs and definitely when it comes to endurance. I’m pretty intense in all honesty.”
Predicted placing: 2nd. Finals or bust.
Charity: Youthline
Jazz Thornton, mental health advocate, 28
The Tea: Thornton may have taken out her season of Dancing With The Stars NZ, but I can’t help but feel like this game is much different and Thornton might not come up trumps when it’s her team that does the voting, not the public. Thornton admits she’s planning to get an alliance going with someone from the other team who is “pulling for you”, but she’s going to need to tread with caution.
Have you done anything to prepare or the challenge of CTI? “I had full intentions to. I did not,” says Thornton with a laugh. A broken hand, care of Lance Savali (is Sabotage Savali at it again?) hindered her preparation, admits Thornton. “It hasn’t quite healed properly so I couldn’t do too much.”
Predicted placing: 13th. Thornton will make a nemesis who will plot her demise.
Charity: Voices of Hope
Steve Price, League legend, 49
The Tea: If I were spilling tea on lovable legend and ex-Warriors star Price, it would have six sugars. This gem of a human is humble, honest, and has a strange gravitational pull that some people are just born with. Despite what he thinks, Price and his 6ft 4 frame are very much still a force to be reckoned with. Could there be a fittingly large target on his back? You bet.
What’s the biggest strength you bring to this competition? “I suppose being part of a team, that’s how I’ve been programmed, so I’m all about that and just making sure you contribute, but also getting others to play a role as well. I want them to be as good as they can be.”
Predicted placing: 6th. He’s going to make it far and create some wholesome friendships along the way.
The Tea: Hot chip aficionado — his lesser-known title — Gibb is equal parts hilarious and humble. He might not rate his chances of winning, but after witnessing Gibb in action, it was easy to see he’s got more in the tank than he might think. With a good alliance on his side and some smart moves, Gibb’s in this for the long haul.
If you had to eliminate someone now, who would it be? Despite plenty of hesitation and an absolute stitch-up, Gibb admits he would send Mel Homer home. “I can’t get rid of Steve ‘cause I’m a massive Warriors fan, plus he would eat me. Look, it’s just too hard ... So, Mel.”
Predicted placing: 7th. His flawless banter will see him go far. Before Steve eats him.
Charity: Cancer Society
Laura Daniel, actor/comedian, 32
The Tea: The mega-talented Daniel is also mega-competitive and she would absolutely push you off a ledge if it meant getting her own footing. She’s become a reality TV favourite in Aotearoa and even though this game is built differently, her impending ruffling of some feathers will have audiences screaming “slay queen” at their screens.
Have you ever had a case of mistaken identity? “Back in the day it used to be Heather Du Plessis-Allan. And in the comments on a picture of me someone was like, “I can’t stand her talkback show,” and I was like, “I don’t have a talkback show?”
Predicted placing: 3rd. Ever seen those clips where the pageant runner-up steals the crown off the winner’s head? Same.
Charity: Shine
Mary Lambie, presenter, 59
The Tea: Stalwart presenter Lambie is coming into the game promising to be a player who others can trust. “I’ve got their backs”, says Lambie, who admits she’s given “zero thought” to others’ strategies. If we know anything about this game, a non-strategic strategy could prove more fatal than a bad strategy.
What role do you think you’ll take on in camp? “If the other team members don’t know how to cook rice properly (the absorption method) then I may well become chief cook (and bottle washer).”
Predicted placing: 15th. You can’t trust a soul in this game, Mary.
The Tea: Popstar Megan Alatini is so fun and someone you absolutely want on your team. The vibe is big sister who has just returned from her OE, seen the sights and now just wants you to thrive and she’s got the catchphrases to match. Alatini says what’s on her mind and has some cracker one-liners.
Have you tried to smuggle anything in? “I want to play this game right, so I have not smuggled anything in, I also don’t have enough pockets and cavities for that.”
Predicted placing: 12th. Will she win? Probably not. Will she be a fan fave? You can count on it.
Charity: Women’s Refuge
Nick Afoa, musical theatre star, 37
The Tea:Lion King star Afoa is smart, and it doesn’t take long to see that he’s a critical thinker. He’s also got the physical attributes to see him do well in challenges and have his team hold on tight to him until it becomes an individual game. But we can’t help but feel like those closest to him might turn on him as finals near?
What’s your biggest strength/asset to your team? “My willingness to jump in is my biggest asset. I also think adaptability. I’m prepared to be unprepared.”
Predicted placing: 4th. A sneaky move will see his demise. So who will cut the nice guys lunch? It’s screaming Vandermade.
Charity: BBM Foundation / Just Move
Mel Homer, broadcaster, 53
The Tea: Radio and TV personality Mel Homer is a force to be reckoned with. Homer was quick to ask for the tea on her team and who was badmouthing her and honestly, it was a total vibe. The mum of three boys is equal parts physically and mentally strong and will be a great voice of reason in her team while providing some killer entertainment.
What made you say yes? “My first reaction was ‘no’, but the more I thought about it, the more I thought you’ve just got to take opportunities as they come — you’ve got to have a crack at something. So I said yes and then I felt sick for days”, Homer laughs before adding her “midlife crisis” might just play out on national TV.
Predicted placing: 11th. Homer will more than prove herself on the show before a dramatic exit.
The Tea: The award-winning actress is a true team player and witnessing her in action you see just how powerful that Lululemon physic is. But Smith isn’t here to play around and she will quickly become one of the leaders within the team, no doubt having a moment as team captain.
How will you cope without your creature comforts? “Definitely going to miss my espresso coffee machine. I just need a moment, I nearly cried thinking about it. I love my coffee machine. It’s just taken me to a deep, dark hole.”
The Tea: Shortland Street actor Lobban was harder to read than Prince Harry’s memoir. And while there was no mention of 8-hour cream in our chat I left wondering is he the villain? Is he the nice guy? The silent assassin? Does he know where he is?
Why did you want to be part of the show? “I have a lot of debts to pay,” laughs the former comedian. “I’ve got some people after me and I thought I could make some money and hide at the same time,” he jokes before admitting his departure from Shorty left him with some free time.
Predicted placing: 18th. When members of Lobban’s team were individually asked who they would eliminate first, in pre-camp, a whopping 50 per cent (of the savages who answered) said lovable Lobban. Based on that stone-cold logic, he’s gone.
Charity: Mental Health Foundation
Turia Schmidt-Peke, actor, 29
The Tea: The Ahikaroa and Shorty Street star is my top pick as your one to watch. Her toughness paired with her likeability and a good sense of humour are the perfect skillset to make it to the bitter end of this brutal comp. My prediction is Schmidt taking on Daniel and Vandermade in a bitter final.
What is the one thing you are least looking forward to going without? “I’ll miss my phone the most, but the one I’m least looking forward to living without is probably a toilet — a flushing toilet!”
Predicted placing: 1st. When push comes to shove the actor will rise to the top and stun her competition. First female winner in 20 years? Yes please.
The Tea: Mic drop. That’s right, Iti may just be the biggest shock casting in Treasure Island history. But the incredibly chilled-out artist appeared to be a voice of calm and reason for his younger teammates. The only thing Iti will be protesting this season is for his teammates to muster all the mana they can as he supports them on their journey.
What do you think your biggest strength is that you bring to the team? “I give advice, but mainly I’m a backbone, so I can add something to it.” Iti adds that he also loves the mystery of the unknown of it all. “I really like it, because even coming to this place was a mystery in itself, so every day is something new.”
Predicted placing: 17th. Iti was such a force of good that I could see him quickly taking the place of an eliminated comrade.
Charity: I am Hope
Celebrity Treasure Island starts on Monday, September 18, TVNZ 2 and TVNZ+
Jenni Mortimer is the New Zealand Herald’s lifestyle and entertainment editor. Jenni started at the Herald in 2017 and previously worked as an education publication editor. She’s also the host of The Herald’s parenting podcast One Day You’ll Thank Me, mum to Knox and one-time Treasure Island castaway.