Best of the Blogs: Rose Matafeo: My inflight sex shame

Herald online

23 Dec, 2014 09:00 PM2 mins to read

Be wary of watching shows like Game of Thrones on a flight.

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The range of inflight entertainment is often rather tragic, leaving travellers having to choose between bizarrely morbid movies or embarrassingly sexy TV shows, writes Rose Matafeo.

The first time I can remember getting on a plane was when I was 16, my first overseas trip as a (sort of) adult.

I remember being so excited for every bit of aeroplane 'business' that I was finally going to experience myself. Microwave-style meals. Unlimited Coca-Cola. A different kind of seat belt than the ones I was previously used to. And perhaps, my favourite of all the mediocre perks of flying - free movies.

In recent years I've become quite terrified of flying, with every tiny bump of turbulence prompting me to go through the five stages of grief in the space of about 30 seconds.

Surely not an uncommon fear. Surely.

Which is why I was surprised when, on my flight last month, I saw that Air NZ's inflight entertainment featured a documentary about death, hosted by Billy Connolly. A show entirely devoted to all things death and dying.

While it was a fantastic show and one I highly recommend, it did seem a rather strange choice. Why on earth are you, mysterious inflight entertainment curator, daring me to contemplate my own mortality while I'm thousands of feet in the air? What kind of cruel trick is this? Why not just go ahead and show a montage of my own life flashing before my eyes? Or perhaps that episode of Murder She Wrote where the guy gets murdered on a flight because someone wanted to steal his diamonds? (Another great piece of television that I can't recommend enough.)

Trapped in a small, confined space for 12 hours, you'll find yourself watching things you would never dream of watching on land. When you're in the air, it's as though you enter some sort of twilight zone where good taste ceases to exist and you find yourself watching four episodes of The Big Bang Theory in a row.

I usually try to stick to my guns and not compromise on my usually high standards* of entertainment.

(*see above, where I expertly reference a specific episode of the masterpiece television series Murder She Wrote.) ...