KEY POINTS:
Amy Winehouse's father, Mitch, has said that he was so convinced his rebel-rousing daughter was about to meet her maker, he wrote a eulogy for her.
If you can stretch your minds back as far as two months ago, you'll remember that Wino was rushed to hospital after she overdosed from a 3-day drug binge. Well, Mitch also says that Amy had a brain seizure.
He said," I know newspapers have obituaries ready for people - well, I'd written one. "
"When Amy had her seizure and was taken to hospital, I really thought that could be it. The doctors told us even a whiff of another drug could kill her."
Sadly, Mitch says that Wino has been dabbling in drugs even after the death scare.
"When I found out Blake had given her more drugs after that [overdose], I couldn't believe it. It was as bad as someone holding a gun to my daughter's head."
"Blake is a bad influence on her and I no longer toe the line and pretend he isn't. Until he came along she was staunchly anti hard drugs. For Amy and Blake to beat their drug problems, they have to go into rehab separately, and he won't let her do that."
Your concern is touching, Mitch.
It looks like you can talk the talk, but can you walk the walk? It's all very well mouthing off to the media about Wino's woes, but a eulogy? Give me a break.
Stop washing your dirty laundry in public and sort this family of yours out, before Wino truly crashes and burns. She needs your help, not your criticisms.
Gandalf back in The Hobbit
Lord of The Rings fans might need to be restrained and sedated when they hear this news:
Light-footed thespian Sir Ian McKellen has said he would be "very pleased" to reprise his role as old greybeard Gandalf in the planned movie of JRR Tolkien's novel The Hobbit.
"If I am still functioning and working well, it is very likely I would be asked to do it," he told news agency Reuters.
The 68-year-old actor played the character in the Academy Award-winning trilogy, directed by our very own Peter Jackson.
"When Peter announced he had withdrawn from The Hobbit, he sent me an email saying 'Because I am not going to do it, it doesn't mean you have to do the same. Of course, you must play Gandalf, whether I direct or not'," Sir Ian told Reuters.
He added: "I am glad to read that it is looking more and more likely ... I would be disappointed if they didn't want to have the original Gandalf.
But don't expect Jackson to have a change of heart and lense the Hobbit Flick - he's said to still be involved in a legal dispute with film studio New Line.
A Rings flick without Jackson's golden touch? I hate to say it, but The Hobbit has free-range turkey written all over it already.
Obligatory Britney post
Talk show queen Oprah reportedly invited Britney Spears to be a guest on her show this week, but the otherwise engaged pop tart didn't return any of her calls.
"Oprah called Britney personally," a Harpo mole tells Star Magazine. "But despite repeated attempts, Britney never had the courtesy to call her back."
Honey, when Oprah calls you don't sit on your hands and look busy. Between drug-testing, custody battles and Starbucks runs, it's clear to see why Britney was far too busy to call Oprah back.
It's official: I'm vindicated.
I've said all along that Britney is delusional, and look, here's the proof.
After being booked at the LAPD yesterday, Britney was quizzed by a CBS reporter about the experience and described the experience as "amazing"
Watch the clip here:
Reporter: How did it go?
Britney: "Amazing."
Reporter: What was the experience like?
Britney:"They were nice. They were really nice."
Reporter: Do you feel relieved?
Britney:"Yeah."
Friend: What are you guys doing tonight?
Britney:"Where's the party at?" [laughs]
Reporter: Any plans for Halloween?
Britney: "Not yet."
Reporter: No outfits for the kids?
Britney: "Um, not yet."
Sure, getting intimate with the law is bound to be a liberating and "amazing" experience, and would put me in a party mood as well. How fabulous, pizza for everyone!
Ellen in tears
TMZ reports that talk show host Ellen Degeneres broke down in tears on her show this week - cutting short her usual chirpy monologue to give an impassioned speech about her recent canine woes.
The normally chirpy comedian walked on to the set amidst the usual applause, but proceeded to quieten the audience and said: "Today is a hard day for me ... I am not capable of coming out and pretending to be funny when things are going so terribly wrong right now."
Fighting back the tears, Ellen proceeded to slip into a monologue about her pitiful battle with a dog rescue group.
Click here to see the video of Ellen telling the story.
Lauryn with (another) child
Serial breeder Lauryn Hill is knocked up with baby number five. This is her fifth sprog with estranged on/off boyfriend, Rohan Marley, son of Bob Marley. This will, however, be Rohan's seventh.
Word has it that love rat Rohan has done a runner and skipped off to Ethiopia leaving poor Lauryn holding the babies.
One word: condom.
Look at this picture of Lauryn...I defy it not to scare the bejesus out of you.
Fast gossip:
* Danny Devito is still small AND big: TSW
* Now THIS is the cover of Britney's new CD: Celebwarship
* Anna Nicole Smith might get exhumed (Yuk!): IDLYITW
* Rihanna gets tattooed: Hollywood Rag
* Teri Hatcher is having some issues: CI
* Madonna's uni-browed daughter Lourdes turned 11 this week: GS
* Is Angelina Jolie getting in-vitro fertilization?: Celebitchy
* Britney tries to look interesting: Pink Is The New Blog
