Inside Money: Socks and Roses - The gifts of Christmas past

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Up to 63 per cent of NZ children could miss out on Christmas presents this year as recently-introduced Anti Gift Laundering (AGL) legislation takes effect, according to a spokesperson for Santa Claus.

"Under AGL we can only deliver presents to children who have completed the NZ government RealMe verification process," the Claus spokesperson said. "With little over a week to go to Christmas less than 40 per cent of the NZ childbase has been authenticated, indicating December 25 could be more disappointing than usual for the vast hordes of materialistic Kiwi youngsters."

It is understood Santa himself has sought a waiver from RealMe registration requirements for commercial reasons.

While the Claus spokesperson encouraged all NZ under-18s to sort out their identities before the December 24 shut-off date, he said the AGL rules were probably a "blessing in disguise" given the elf shortfall this season.

"We've had a huge reduction in elf numbers this year following the introduction of new education standards for the Santa's Little Helping profession," the spokesperson said.

"You'd think it wouldn't be too hard learning how to wear a green suit, pop on a peaked cap with bell on top and wrap the odd present but the number of authorised elves has fallen significantly since the rules came into force.

"At present, we have just 1,853 elves on our books - and most of them are only qualified to package simple items such as socks or boxes of Roses chocolates."

The AGL Act was introduced earlier this year to bring NZ in line with international rules designed to counter an alleged re-gifting crisis that was threatening global capitalism.

"According to our analysis, millions, if not billions, of Christmas gifts - notably, socks, boxes of Roses chocolates and foot spas - are simply being re-gifted from one year to the next," a spokesperson for global capitalism said. "If people don't buy their share of ugly, useless crap each festive season, there's a strong chance the world's economy could collapse - or worse."

Meanwhile, the Claus spokesperson said after pressure from lobby groups Santa has dropped the controversial 'Ho, ho, ho' from his traditional Christmas greeting.

"The term 'ho' is considered offensive in some jurisdictions - just as 'tax' is in others. We're simply moving with the times," Santa said from his new corporate headquarters in the Virgin Islands.

Despite the upheaval in Santa's back-office operations, experts are predicting Christmas joy will be up 13 per cent year-on-year while goodwill-to-all-men indicators are flat.

However, a recent OECD report found that the top 1 per cent would probably experience more than 90 per cent of global good cheer on a seasonally-adjusted basis.

"That still leaves plenty of cheeriness for the rest of us," an OECD economist based in the Virgin Islands said. "After all, spending time with friends and family costs nothing - especially if they pay."