New Zealand's frontline diplomatic troops for the Apec invasion got their riding instructions yesterday: smile, don't mumble like 15-year-old schoolboys and don't ask double-barrelled questions.
The homily on being a good Kiwi host was delivered by the Minister of Foreign Affairs, Don McKinnon, a veteran of Apec summit diplomacy.
Hetold 600 New Zealand liaison officers, police and drivers assigned to the 20 visiting delegations that they were ambassadors for the country, the first and last New Zealanders the VIPs were likely to see each day.
If they were grumpy in the morning, that could rub off on the delegates; if they were bright and happy, it would probably perk the visitors up.
Mr McKinnon got into what was clearly a personal bugbear when he asked the liaison staff to speak clearly, "not like 15-year-old New Zealand males at the back of a classroom."
Another pet hate was the "terrible habit" of saying to someone: "Do you want to go to that restaurant, or not?" which required two answers.
And the equally confusing: "Do you not wish to leave now?"
The New Zealanders would be expected to have all sorts of information at hand, he said, including the answer to the ubiquitous "How many people live here?" questions.
Mr McKinnon then asked reporters to leave, presumably so he could deliver a full and frank pep talk on how important it was to be nice.
The 107 liaison officers have been seconded from several Government departments, and include former ambassadors and senior diplomats.
