Kerre Woodham: Lighten up, people

For heaven's sake! Enough already! As much as the New Zealand Herald and a strong cup of coffee are a part of my morning ritual, I'm going to bloody well find a new way to start my day unless the Herald lightens up.

Oh, it's not only the Herald. Radio, telly and other media are peddling doom and gloom with equal ghoulishness. But the Herald is what I see first. And it's getting me down. I accept that we consumers are all shallow, vapid lotus eaters who have used our homes as ATMs and spent way beyond our means and that it's now time to pay the piper.

I'm sorry for taking that overseas holiday when I turned 40. I understand that I was a part of the culture of excess (albeit a minor one) that resulted in the economic meltdown. I know we're in a recession. I appreciate that there are businesses closing and others really struggling and that some families are suffering.

But Jesus, Mary, Joseph and the little donkey too - how does negative story after negative story help us work our way out of the situation? If I didn't have such a nauseatingly chirpy Pollyanna disposition, I would have used my cut-up credit cards to slash my wrists after this week.

Check out just three days' worth of Herald headlines. "Recession crushes used car yards as one in five shuts". "One in five Kiwis fears being sacked". "Recession sinks luxury boat firm". "Unemployment could reach 8 per cent". "Climate of fear pushes NZ market to five-year low". "Tough times here to stay, says English".

All that in just THREE days! The one bright note was "Fewer see finances as worse, poll finds". But really and truly as antidotes go, it was a fart in a thunderstorm. I'm not an economist. Doing a sixth-form economics studies paper doesn't really count, especially when you only did it so you didn't have to do maths. But as I understand it, markets - be they housing, stock or pork belly - are built on confidence.

How in God's name can anyone have confidence when the bad news keeps coming at you? There are more punches being thrown than we'll ever see in the David Tua/Shane Cameron fight.

I know it's easy for me to tell people to lighten up because I'm still in a job. For those who've been made redundant, who have mortgage payments and bills to pay and dependents, it's hard to be chipper.

But I know that my job could go in a heartbeat.

If Tony O'Reilly decides to flick his far-flung media empire because he needs the readies to pay for the avgas for the private jet, I'll be stuffed. But just as those of us clinging on to jobs by our fingertips don't need to read about the chasm we're a pay cheque away from falling into, neither do those who are newly unemployed need to read or hear or see just how dire their situations are.

How about a little optimism, people? A little more die on your feet; a little less live on your knees.

The situation seems clear. For those who have disposable folding, get spending. Those who don't, pay off debt and do not, under any circumstances, apply for credit.

Things are so tight now that before I can put a can of baked beans and a loaf of bread on tick at the dairy till pay day, I have to fill out three forms and provide a character reference.

Do not lock yourself in the house, cut off contact with the outside world and wait for the sky to fall in no matter what the media might tell you. One in five Kiwis might fear being sacked. But four out of five do not. And isn't that worth a headline or two?