Anthony Doesburg: Phone complaints? I've got a few to mention

I preface this column with the hope that it won't mean I've shared my last drink with Vodafone spokesman, and former colleague, Paul Brislen.

Brislen was kind enough to thrust an expensive cocktail into my hands at a recent high-tech industry event, so it might seem churlish to use this week's space to urge the Government to put the clamps on Vodafone's business.

Not just Vodafone's, of course, but Telecom's too. But I focus on Vodafone because, as a customer and the parent of a number of young customers, I've often found myself cursing the quality and cost of its service. Anyway, Telecom's shortcomings have been well advertised.

But just to prove that I'm an equal opportunities whinger, as an indirect Telecom customer - by virtue of the internet and landline services I get from Orcon - I have this long-standing complaint: for some unexplained reason, caller ID won't work on my line, although Orcon cheerfully bills me for it each month.

One more thing about Telecom: note the disclosure of interest at the bottom of this column.

This column is my two cents' worth in the debate over whether mobile termination rates should be regulated.

I don't have a meticulously reasoned rebuttal of the claims justifying the cost charged by network operators for carrying calls that originated on rival networks.

I simply don't believe the cost is as great as Vodafone and Telecom say. Now, however, there's a chance to slash termination rates, and bring down the cost of mobile calling. We've arrived at this point through a remarkable change of heart by the Commerce Commission.

In February, the commission recommended the Government not regulate termination rates after Vodafone and Telecom promised to phase in reductions. This was universally condemned, except by you know who.

Then, a month ago, Vodafone shot itself - and Telecom - in the foot, making prices for calls between its customers so cheap - 6c a minute - that the commission went back to the drawing board. Vodafone's price offer, which it withdrew yesterday, was such that new market entrants would struggle, the commission said last week, and the Government should step in after all.

Vodafone's marketers had been too clever for their own good, showing customers how low prices could be, and catching the regulator's eye.

Concocting complicated offerings with lots of fine print isn't just a Vodafone skill. Telecom's former boss, Theresa Gattung, opened everyone's eyes to the cynical ploy of using "confusion as [the] chief marketing tool" in a 2006 talk to analysts.

But Vodafone has refined the technique. Some examples: having hooked young customers on its $10-a-month for 2000 texts prepay plan, it's now running an ad campaign saying texting is no way to communicate and they really should put their phones to their intended use, talking. Who could disagree - if the price was right?

Another classic is the international data roaming cost cut announced in a May 5 press release: "Vodafone customers want to be able to use their mobiles from anywhere in the world and as more customers use smartphones, the price of data roaming has become more of an issue.

"Vodafone is tackling this problem head on by slashing the price of mobile roaming." Raising the question: who set the price in the first place?

Other Vodafone gripes I've accumulated: having changed plans to trim my monthly bill - caught by the fine print, the bill has actually risen - it took two months for the credit for early contract termination to go through. In the meantime, I was threatened with having the service cut.

Half the time I go online to pay my bill, the website doesn't work properly. Calls to customer service are an ordeal - a recorded voice gives a shouted recitation of services you don't want before you get a chance to tell your sorry saga, over and over again, to a person who speaks poor English.

Coverage is lousy off the beaten track, you have to pay to retrieve voice messages, and on the subject of the aforementioned TXT2000, I can't tell you the number of indignant young people I've had to soothe after their credit was wiped because of overly complicated payment terms and conditions.

If I didn't feel ripped off each month, many of these complaints would go away.

May the Government take the chance to bring prices into line with the quality of service. And Brislen, I owe you a drink.

Change of heart

February 2010: Commerce Commission recommends that the Government accept Vodafone and Telecom undertakings to reduce their mobile phone termination charges*, rather than regulate those charges.

April 2010: Vodafone launches new pricing plan for prepaid mobiles.

May 2010: After reconsidering, Commerce Commission says its preliminary view is that those services should be regulated, and the phone companies' undertakings should not be accepted.

* Mobile termination rates are the prices mobile phone companies charge each other to receive calls or texts from other fixed or mobile networks.

Disclosure: As a writer for hire, Anthony Doesburg has done work for a number of technology companies, including Telecom.