From a personal finance perspective, these conversations can also teach children that money doesn’t grow on trees and that virtually every family has to make choices about how they budget and spend their money.
These conversations aren’t easy. I had a monumental failure in Fiji when I explained to my then-young children that many locals didn’t have money to buy toys. “Why don’t they get some out of the money machine?” was their response. I’m sure I floundered at that point.
Glasgow recommended asking children open-ended questions to encourage reflection. “Talk to them in an age-appropriate way about how some children aren’t as lucky as they are at this time of year when lots of children in New Zealand have so much.
“You can say really simple things like, ‘Do you know there are kids in New Zealand whose families don’t have enough money to buy Christmas presents?’ Or, ‘Did you know that Father Christmas doesn’t always visit every house?’ It’s about having a conversation starter in your back pocket to make children aware in a way that resonates with them, so you can have a deeper conversation about why poverty exists.”
Another issue to start conversations about is the teasing that some children get at school if they don’t have things that other children take for granted. “It’s really important to emphasise that having less doesn’t make the individual less,” Glasgow said. “They might be rich in lots of other ways. Also, poverty is never the fault of a child.
“You could say things like, ‘Some children don’t have enough food for dinner. How would you feel about that?’ It’s about open-ended questions, rather than once-over lightly.”
Conversations such as these can lead to a deeper understanding of personal finances. But there are other very important reasons to have these reflective conversations, Glasgow said. “We want compassionate citizens, and compassion for young people who are vulnerable, because our children will be sitting alongside those kids in the classroom. They might not have had breakfast. They might not have lunch. Young kids need to know that it’s not okay to make children who have less than you feel bad. Because it’s not their fault. They’re not responsible, and their parents are doing the best they can.
“Bring it back to thinking about, ‘How would you feel if you couldn’t join a sports club? How would you feel if you didn’t have shoes on your feet? How would you feel if your uniform had been worn by your four older siblings, and you were being teased at school because of it?’
“Once you open the conversation up and create a broader understanding, it enables them to be more empathetic.”
Thinking of her own children, Glasgow added, “I just want to know that my kids won’t walk past things that are fundamentally flawed within our society. And poverty is one of our greatest flaws.”
New Zealanders currently sponsor 7500 children through Variety, and another 3000 are on its waiting list. Who better to describe what financial sponsorship means than a young adult who was sponsored? As a child, Lockie Richards, now a post-graduate student, couldn’t understand why Santa only brought him $2 Shop or other budget toys. “Why would Santa give me budget-y toys and give the best toys to those who can get all the best stuff anyway?”
Richards said he would be careful not to bring his presents into school. “I didn’t let [teasing] happen,” he said. “Fortunately, I was getting hand-me-down [clothing] from my cousins, although I would get teased a little about why it was three sizes too big.”
Once he was in the Variety programme, Richards started receiving the types of toys his friends did and no longer felt left out.
