The 111 Files: It's loss that people resist, not change

Inspector Bruce Horne.

Our city needs to look at positive ways of making communities safer

John had his first heart attack when he was 53. His doctor told him that unless he made some significant changes to his lifestyle he would have another; and the next one would probably kill him. Apparently only 20 per cent of the people who receive advice from their doctor of the kind given to John, act on it.

The conventional wisdom is that people resist change, but it would seem that isn't the case. I can't think of a time when someone won lotto, only to say, "No thanks, I don't like change." It's not change that people resist, it's loss. In John's case, he didn't want to lose the comfort of cigarettes and fatty pork.

When we begin to understand that resistance to change is usually driven by a concern about loss, the decisions that some people make become easier to understand. Which brings me back to the two subjects we touched on last week - family violence and criminal gangs.

A couple of weeks ago I told you about an encounter between a patched gang member and his teenage son. The gang member was telling his son not to join the gang, as it would ruin his life. Which was a bit of a confusing message for the son, who understandably asked, "But if it's so bad, why are you still there?" The short answer to that question is that his father found it too hard to give up the perceived benefits of gang membership. It was a fear of what he might lose that was a barrier to change.

I believe that if we really want to see Rotorua become a safer city, one of the things that we need to get our heads around is this idea that people resist loss, not change. Once we understand what people are afraid of giving up, it becomes easier to stand in their shoes and see things from their perspective. It is from that starting point that we can also begin helping them to see what a better life might look like.

I love this city and I think it has tremendous potential. One of the keys to unlocking that potential is finding ways to make our community safer; and building a sense of hope and optimism. We need to find ways to help people who are crippled by the fears that are characteristic of family violence and gang involvement to imagine a better future; to see a pathway out of bullying and oppression. That's our challenge. My question is, "are you willing to help make it happen?"