Opinion: Take the time to listen

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I think I have become a little like the people I disliked in the past. The ones that open a conference or are conference key note speakers. The ones that breeze in and breeze out again.

And it's not just the big conferences, it's also the small community speaking engagements too. Speakers who don't make the time to stay and have the invited cup of tea, lunch or dinner with those attending.

We're important people with a round of appointments that must be kept. We can't afford to hang around. Most conference organisers hope speakers, particularly key note speakers will. Stay and take the time to listen and gain insight and understanding of the issues that matter most to the conference and meeting attendees.

They come from businesses and organisations that are working hard to represent their sector. Constantly striving to remain relevant and provide best practice services. At conference they talk about the issues and challenges they have to wrestle with daily.

They also attempt to look over the horizon at what might be coming up next. Often changes to current government policy or funding. When you stay, you get the opportunity to meet and network with those who "walk the talk". Get the job done. Staying shows you have listened and will hopefully be prepared to take some action in support of what you have heard.

I used to get particularly upset with the Wellington suits that breezed in and out. Someone must have got in their ear because in recent years they tend to stay at least for part of the programme after they have finished speaking.

Last week I came very close to breezing in and out myself. It's something I have always tried to avoid because it gets noticed and is not appreciated. Especially when you are paid a speaking fee, often with travel and accommodation included.

I was asked to open a two-day conference. The organiser invited me to stay for one or both days if I could. I said I might be able to pop back from time to time, knowing that would probably be impossible.

I looked at the programme and decided I would stay for a couple of hours. I stayed for the entire two days. I managed to push scheduled meetings back to later in the week. Why did I stay? Because I have rarely attended a meeting that had my undivided attention from the word go.

The participants were Maori war veterans. They served in the Royal New Zealand Navy and Army. Their tours of duty included Vietnam, Cambodia, Malaysia, Borneo and Korea. Warring hot spots since 1957. Most of those present, all now retired and in senior years, spent between 20 - 30 years in the services.

The conference discussed issues that the public has rarely heard about. Issues that service personnel talk about amongst themselves. I suspect this is about to change. These men didn't come together just for a chat and a cup of tea. And true to their service background they are preparing the ground work thoroughly.

What struck me, right from the outset, was the respect they showed to each other during the course of the two days. Everyone had ample time to express their views on the matters raised. If someone wanted to refer back to an issue already discussed, not a problem. None of this "we've already covered that item, let's move on". They spoke in Maori and English when it suited them. In the evening I attended their dinner. They wore their medals.

I know sometimes it's just not possible to stay on at a conference or meeting after speaking. But if you really want to know what's going on, what has stirred so many that they wanted to attend, then you have to make the effort to remain for at least part of the conference. With me it is usually because the organisers believe if I am better informed, then perhaps I could advocate their cause. I am pleased I stayed for the duration of the Maori war veterans' conference. They targeted well. I listened and will support their future plans.

Merepeka lives in Rotorua. She writes, speaks and broadcasts to thwart the spread of political correctness.