As the months went by and he received, "Thanks, but no thanks," to all his job applications he slipped into a state of despondency and hopelessness.
He tries to snap out of it but like the other chap, his long-term unemployment is affecting his relationship with his partner.
His mental and emotional health have suffered and other areas of his life are crumbling.
Sometimes we fail to understand how important, and meaningful, having a job is. A job means we are providing for our family. We are not beholden to anyone else. We can take care of our own. We know we are also contributing to the local and national economy. We are playing our part. Self-worth is bolstered by participation.
Both men questioned what more they could do to secure their families economic future.
They have the work ethic, were willing to work and spent months looking for a job. When I told them 70 per cent of job vacancies are never advertised they were amazed. It is word of mouth, contacts and knowing who to approach that lands you a job these days.
What did surprise me was they were both willing to retrain. Even the one with a job would look at a retraining option. They don't know in what area but would like some job training or career change information.
The emphasis today is on getting young people into training and employment. This is laudable, but we should not dismiss the 40-plus age group of men and women who need to be in permanent employment.
These are people who have worked and earned their own money. Statistically they are not yet in the long-term unemployed category. But they have shifted from earning their own money, to being recipients of the unemployment benefit. Neither liked being in that situation and wanted to know what is available to help them retrain.
When you consider an unemployed person, if he or she remains unemployed for the next five years, it will cost the taxpayer something in the region of $100,000. Why not invest 20 per cent of that total upfront and support them to retrain in areas that need qualified workers - plumbers, builders, scaffolders, fitters and welders, technology and infrastructure specialists, healthcare workers including nurses and farm workers?
Anywhere where the workforce needs bolstering. Most would retrain within three to four years.
We have to ensure our youth get into training and work. All research suggests that within 20 years New Zealand won't have enough workers. We will be casting around overseas to see where we can poach them from.
Men and women in their early 40s have another 20 years of working life ahead of them. They should not be consigned to the "too-hard basket" because we are not taking a pragmatic approach to steering them towards suitable retraining options. If we're talking about applying some innovative thinking to solving the problem of worker shortages, predicted in the near future, then we can't afford to overlook the 40-plus age group. Job training for young people requires a different approach to those in their 40s looking for work.
Know the difference and develop appropriate strategies to support each group.
Concentrating on addressing youth unemployment only, means the taxpayer will shell out millions of dollars each year to keep retrainable, unemployed mid-life workers parked up on the side line. We can't afford it.
There are also the costs associated with mental and physical health, family relationship issues and loss of labour force participation and productivity. These add up to many more thousands of dollars on top of the unemployment benefit. New Zealanders participate more fully in society when they are in paid employment. If we value them, and say "you are important to us" then let's invest in their future, and ours. It's about jobs.
• Merepeka lives in Rotorua. She writes, speaks and broadcasts to thwart the spread of political correctness.
