Jo Raphael: Burglary victims should not blame themselves

COMMENT:

If you haven't been the victim of a crime then you're lucky. Crime of one type or another has affected most Kiwis.

Growing up, our family home was broken into a number of times, each time the thieves got away with something.

I remember having my car broken into while flatting. They ruined the car door lock, rifled around, eventually only getting away with a pair of prescription sunglasses — of no use to anyone else except me.

The sunnies were packed in a bag — out of sight — but I guess it's my fault for not bringing the bag inside for the night.

I blamed myself — but why should I? Shouldn't I blame the person who decided to invade my space and take what didn't belong to them?

The feeling of being violated, knowing that someone has been in your home — the place where you are supposed to feel safe — is longer lasting than the loss of what has actually been taken.

We reported recently that a Tauranga man had been left "psychologically damaged" after his workshop was broken into over lockdown.

Dennis James decided to stay with family when the country moved to alert level 4.

His workshop was padlocked but in May thieves broke in and stole specialised tools and equipment he had acquired over the past 30 years.

The devastation of the break-in was so bad that he considered not reopening his business.

He says the theft has affected his mental health.

"I am scared to go out and I've decided I won't be going away again... I thought I'd get over it but I haven't been able to."

He says he was still weighing up whether to sell the business and if someone wanted to buy it, they would "get a bargain".

"The less you have, the less you can get hurt."

That is so sad.

Challenge Rotorua was subject to a ram raid in the first week of lockdown. Nothing was taken from the shop but owner Harpreet Singh says it has taken them four months to replace the glass on the doors due to Covid-19 delays.

He has to now go to the expense of installing bollards to prevent it from happening again.

Victim Support researcher Dr Petrina Hargrave says burglaries are a "frightening and traumatic experience" and often had "long-lasting emotional and financial consequences".

She said burglaries could sometimes be a "tipping point" for victims and they may never recoup the costs.

People who get burgled should contact police to keep themselves safe but they are also entitled to free support from Victim Support.

That's the most important thing, however — support.

It's essential that we know what tools we have available when we are victims of crime, whether that be police, Victim Support, family or trusted friends and colleagues.

We should stop blaming ourselves and get the help we need when we are feeling vulnerable.