US families are taking tobacco companies to court and winning big. Photo / File
Smoke and get rich. Not as silly as it sounds. Only in America could you smoke yourself to oblivion and have your family rake in millions - er sorry, billions.
Bereaved families are taking tobacco companies to court in droves for phenomenal sums - and winning. The latest damages were awarded to the widow of a chain smoker who died of lung cancer 18 years ago - the sum awarded was more than US$23.6 billion ($27.6 billion).
The damages were against the R J Reynolds Tobacco Company, the nation's second-biggest cigarette maker. The woman individually sued the tobacco company on behalf of her late husband, the largest individual case of its kind.
The jury wanted to send a statement that "tobacco companies cannot continue to lie to the American people about the addictiveness of and the deadly chemicals in their cigarettes". But surely anyone with half a brain would know this already. "This verdict goes far beyond the realm of reasonableness and fairness," pleaded the tobacco company; and I agree.
How did the widow prove her husband smoked only cigarettes made by that particular company? Shouldn't all tobacco companies be held accountable for his untimely death?
Also, where does it stop? Who will fork out for all other untold millions who died on the end of a cigarette, and will all of them get US$23.6 billion - or even a tenth of that? Who will pay this money and wouldn't the world economy simply collapse if such an amount of money even existed? Only in America would somebody knowingly ingest or practise something they know is bad for them, and then subsequently scream "entrapment" or "seduction" to explain their addiction, and then turn around and take someone to the cleaners with the help of conniving lawyers! Absurd.
One has to wonder what all the hoo-hah is about after Gerry Brownlee squeezed through a side door at Christchurch Airport, so as to bypass the security check. When you're big, important and in a hurry, it must be tempting to bully your way past the general hoi polloi who are required to go through the tedious checking process.
Of course, the country can ill-afford to have its Minister of Transport miss his flight and consequently be late for the next important meeting.
Unfortunately for him, the airport authorities didn't see it that way and as a result the honourable Mr Brownlee has been brought down to size. Arrogant behaviour for sure, but hardly a danger to our domestic airways on this occasion. Nevertheless there are those who want the man to stand down during the "investigation".
Investigation for what? There's no need - and by the time you read this column, the matter should rightfully be dead and buried to allow the man to get on with his work. Mr Brownlee's reaction hasn't helped matters. Self-flagellating himself by offering his resignation was yet another hollow gesture of silliness, which we've heard many times before.
For pity's sake, if all the resignations offered or called for were put into effect, we'd have no MPs left.
Mr Brownlee was way out of line with attempting to leap frog the airport security system, but I doubt if he'll ever pull such a stunt again, so let's put the matter to rest and get on with trying to run our troubled nation.
We read that injuries on scooters have soared in Rotorua. I wouldn't mind betting that it's the same in other places as well. Hardly surprising, when you see those who ride these nifty two-wheelers going hell for leather around the streets.
My wife was horrified last week to see two helmetless nippers "commuting" to Rotorua Primary School, hoofing down the hospital hill on the road at breakneck speed.
Those tiny 98mm wheels were certainly getting a hammering and spinning to the max.
Should we bubble-wrap riders by insisting they wear helmets?
"Overkill - let kids be kids", I hear some say - but I don't think so. Given the warp factor that these modern scooters can reach, it seems that wearing protective headgear of some sort and other body protection would make a heck of a lot of sense.
Brian Holden has lived in Rotorua for most of his life and has recently celebrated 10 years' writing And Another Thing.