The journalist, author, and marathon runner shares her thoughts after moving into palliative care.
“She was authentic and she did push through. I’ve learned so much from her.”
Those are the words of Becky Aud-Jennison after the death of her friend, Tauranga mother and writer Dawn Picken.
Picken, a 52-year-old author, marathon runner, Bay of Plenty Times Weekendwriter and columnist, Toi Ohomai tutor, and former television journalist, lost her battle with a rare liver disease at 8.12pm yesterday.
Aud-Jennison said Dawn’s death was a deep shock despite her friend’s terminal diagnosis and declining health.
“We are feeling like we’ve run a marathon with Dawn but it’s not the end of the race we were hoping for,” she said.
“She wouldn’t be stopping to smell the roses but she would be running to smell the roses. And she wasn’t going to stop until she was made to stop.”
Aud-Jennison said Dawn’s legacy was one of “being real”.
“She was authentic and she did push through. I’ve learned so much from her.”
Dawn had an incurable “one-in-a-million” liver condition, Caroli disease.
In October, Dawn’s health began to deteriorate and she was first admitted to Tauranga Hospital after showing signs of internal bleeding. She was later discharged but was readmitted on November 8 after her condition worsened.
Initially, a scan appeared to show a liver lobe had infarcted/died and a large portal vein clot, which meant she was not suitable for a liver transplant. Doctors suggested Dawn was approaching the end of her life.
Dawn’s deteriorating health was a shock to many who knew her. She had launched her book Love, Loss and Lifelines: My Year of Grief on the Run on November 3.
Dawn Picken, pictured in October before the launch of her book. Photo / Andrew Warner
Dawn, with help from friends, documented her deteriorating health online via the website CaringBridge and shared her story with the Bay of Plenty Times Weekend. The former television journalist had publicly shared her grief journey of losing her late husband Sean Stanelun after 10 years of marriage, via blogs and columns and most recently in her book. He died unexpectedly in 2010. Their children, Fiona and Finley, were 5 and 3.
As Dawn’s health deteriorated, friends set up a Givealittle fund to help provide support to Dawn and particularly her children.
After Dawn’s initial story was published on December 3, a liver specialist reviewed Dawn’s scans and got in touch three days later, wanting to carry out an assessment to see if a transplant were possible.
Dawn Picken with daughter Fiona, affectionately dubbed "barnacle" for always being at her mother's side. Photo / Supplied
However, on December 20, specialists found cancerous tumours and the spots in her lungs, the blood clotting, and what looked like areas within her spleen and liver that had died were all related to invasive cancer, cholangiocarcinoma.
She returned to Waipuna Hospice on Thursday where “comfort measures” were made and she was supported by friends and family.
Aud-Jennison has known Dawn and the children for more than 11 years. She said Dawn had always been transparent about her condition but “there’s been a bit of disbelief about that because she was so healthy and active so we would push it to the backs of our minds”.
“She told me in October, after the first hospitalisation, between the two of us ‘I think this is the beginning of the end’.
“I just thought ‘oh no. no. no. She seemed to know better than we did.”
Bay of Plenty Times reporter Dawn Picken, pictured in 2019/ Photo / Andrew Warner
Because of Dawn’s condition, she was ineligible for life insurance.
One of Dawn’s dying wishes was to ensure her children, Fiona and Finley, were looked after and could study.
Fiona is studying medical imaging in Auckland while Finley is in the United States with his grandfather to complete his final year of school. He hopes to go to university.
Aud-Jennision said she had never seen a bond between a mother and daughter such as Dawn and Fiona, who Dawn affectionately dubbed “barnacle” in her last interview because she was always at her side.
Some of the Givealittle money will be used to reunite Fiona with Finley and their grandparents in the United States before Fiona returns to Auckland next month to find accommodation and study, Aud-Jennison said.
“They were supposed to be over there for Christmas but Dawn was too unwell.”
In her last interview on Friday, Dawn, speaking from bed, asked for help via the Givealittle fund because her wish was to “make the most of helping my kids before I go”.
“Before it seemed like more of a show of support ... now, it’s more and more real, that this is it,” she said.
“I need to know that my kids are going to be able to do what they need to do to have a roof over their heads and really, for me, completion of their studies is very important,” she said.
Close to $34,000 had been raised by 4.30pm yesterday via the Givealittle site.
In that last interview, Dawn also thanked those people who had shown support and concern and for “never giving up on us, no matter how events turn out”.
