Stephanie Worsop: 10 tips I wish I knew as a new mum

Being a new parent can be both heart-swelling and tear-inducing. Photo / Getty Images

COMMENT:
If you noticed my absence and wondered why, it was because I've been busy taking care of our first baby.

And like every new parent, this time has been both heart-swelling and tear-inducing.

There was plenty of advice flung at me during my pregnancy and as a new mother, pre-lockdown, but here are the things I wish I had known:

1. Your birth story may not be what you envisaged and it's okay to take time to come to terms with that.

2. Everyone tells you the first six weeks are the hardest so when we breezed through it I smugly thought we were blessed with the best baby in the world. I was then caught off guard by the despair I felt at the eight-week mark when the midwives stopped visiting, mum had gone home, hubby was back at work and I was left caring for this tiny human alone.

3. Fed is best. I gave breastfeeding a decent crack but when we decided to put our son on formula, every resource we turned to pushed breast is best, even at the expense of the mother's mental health. Do what is right for you.

4. You may have the strongest marriage but you will still bicker with your partner about the most miniscule things. Suddenly that cup they leave on the bench will drive you mad and hearing them snore while you get up for the third time that night will make you want to smother them.

5. There will be seemingly simple things you have to be taught, like how to burp a baby or make a bottle of formula. Everything is foreign to begin with, you will learn.

6. Buy newborn clothing with zippers. You do not want to fiddle with teeny-tiny buttons at 2am while your baby is kicking and screaming.

7. Going out is not as scary as it seems. It took me ages to take our baby out alone because I was anxious about not being able to soothe him if he started crying. Most babies like being walked around in the pram, so trips to town can be enjoyable for you both.

8. Showers turn into this magical alone time where you can soak and pamper to your heart's content while your partner looks after the baby. Make the most of them.

9. People will say "enjoy every moment" but the best advice I was given was you don't have to. There will be moments at 3am when you're rocking a colicky baby and wishing you were 23 again, sipping cocktails in Bali. It doesn't mean you don't love your baby.

10. Fake it until you make it. Take the wins where you can get them and remember every parent has been where you are. You are doing great.