Actually, we could be twins - except for the height, hair, colouring, his weather-prediction abilities and fine voice.
Still, that's no reason for Winnie to leg it rather than face the man he expelled from the party for a crime he didn't commit.
We now know- and Horan protested his innocence all the way through - that, according to an investigation, he didn't take money from his late mother's bank accounts despite the nasty allegation from a relative.
So, as an adult, what should Winnie do?
You'd think he would apologise, wouldn't you? I mean, most people would if they cocked up something that badly.
The NZ First leader lodged a complaint with the Serious Fraud Office and those guys have now handballed it to the local police to sort out.
Horan says - as he did during the original investigation - that he is innocent and he will help police with the investigation as much as he can and has said it was only brought about because Winnie the Peters is trying to re-establish some credibility. As a political watcher and voter I would suggest to those in NZ First that they tell their figurehead that he man up and do the right thing.
Sorry shouldn't be the hardest word (apologies to Bernie Taupin) and ... after all ... it is only five little letters.
I KNOW there are many folk who believe in giving people second chances, but surely those wanting them should make a bit of an effort themselves.
Take for example the 20-something woman who arrived in our region wanting to make a new start for herself.
She had moved away from the wild northern centre of Whangarei where, clearly, she had made a few boo-boos in her past.
Well, it didn't start well down here.
Somehow she managed to run off Gravatt Rd and hit another car before doing her best to destroy a house by running through it and doing about $53,000 in damage to said abode.
But it gets better.
This new-life seeker was found to be over the drink-driving limit and, to cap matters off, didn't even have a licence.
I'm thinking that maybe we should do a quick whip-around and buy her a one-way bus ticket back to the lawless North where she will fit right back in.
"WELL be with you, gentlemen" ... oooo I feel a Shakespearean moment or two coming up.
It is a greeting from the classic tale of Hamlet - the tale of a young Danish prince who causes more grief for Scandinavia than the Vikings and European Union combined.
It is one of William Shakespeare's finest works and has the marvellous monologue that starts "To be or not to be" and also the grave scene's "Alas poor Yorick."
Hamlet contains one of the finest death scenes ever written where the tragic Ophelia - made immortal in the Pre-Raphaelite painting by Sir John Everett Millais - meets her fate.
I have seen Hamlet on a number of occasions and am riveted every time I do.
I'll get another chance this week as the play is being performed in a four-show limited season at the 16th Ave Theatre from Thursday through Saturday, including a 2pm matinee extra on Saturday. Hopefully all fans of the Great Bard will get along and enjoy the family fights, the swordplay and the tragic story.
Now apparently Hamlet has never been performed before in Tauranga - and to think that some people sneer at the culture levels here in our very provincial town - and considering it was written more than 400 years ago I guess we can say "better late than never".
OH WE have all made dumb mistakes in copy, but I did guffaw at a story in a paper this week that had a Kiwi heading back here from "Papua New Zealand".
I know we're heading down the flush hole to Third World status, but to confuse NZ with Papua New Guinea is pretty extreme ... for a while at least.
Richard Moore is an award-winning Western Bay journalist and photographer.
richard@richardmoore.com
