Hits radio host, celebrant and MC Will Johnston muses on his indulgent life in the Bay of Plenty
Matilda Rice will be MC at the Ladies' Charity Lunch in June, and actress Miriama Smith will be a guest speaker.
Don't be that person that sees your newsfeed and Insta/Snapchat stories full of people you know being there and having fun without you.
Put 1000 women in a room together, all glammed up, add lavish amounts of good food and great booze, give them man-servants, guest speakers, charity auctions and a band at the end of the event.
Look, I'm not saying the point of it is one big booze-up, getting loose and spending your kids' inheritance (as fun as that sounds — let the little buggers earn their own cash, I say).
But I am saying there is a significant amount of fun had and not a lot of regret.
Last year I was a "Bond Boy".
A couple of tables purchased my baby-giraffe-in-a-suit-type body for their use throughout the afternoon.
New Zealand actress Miriama Smith will be a guest speaker. Photo / Alan Gibson
By that I mean I kept their drinks topped up, purchased at the bar for them, had good yarns and made bids on the auctions on their behalf.
And slapped the hand of the lady who said she was straightening my bow tie as she started to unbutton my shirt.
Though that was a bad move for charity because the next table's Bond Boy was charging $20 per button undone on his shirt.
But his body was more tanned-muscular-yet-lean-antelope than baby giraffe.
I heard Art Green (The Bachelor NZ) might be there this year.
I imagine his price will be more than $20 per button.
I also imagine whatever that price is would be paid without a second thought by his table!
Winston Peters was there last year too.
The thing I'm actually most excited about this year is the MC, Matilda Rice (of The Bachelor NZ fame and hence Art Green possibly being there).
If you don't follow her on Instagram then you need to get that follow sorted immediately.
She's hilarious, real, super intelligent and refreshingly original on there and in all of the ventures she seems to continue to have.
Guest speakers are actress Miriama Smith (Xena: Warrior Princess, Shortland Street, The Tribe, Filthy Rich and 800 Words) and television personality and cosmetician Suzy Heazlewood.
How cool is that — two people from totally different walks of life, but still fully relatable and interesting to the same audience.
Get your tickets.
Don't be that person that sees your newsfeed and Insta/Snapchat stories full of people you know being there and having fun without you.
I almost hate myself for that last sentence and what it represents in our society. But I also feel like that's exactly what I'd be doing if I was you! Who have I become?
Bond. Will Bond. That's who.
This year's Ladies' Charity Lunch is on June 8 and it's going to sell out (it does every year).
The money raised goes to Waipuna Hospice and Mt Maunganui Lifeguard Service. You'll be damned happy you donated if you ever need those two organisations for sure!
