This year is the 100th anniversary of the landing at Gallipoli beaches, below the steep and exposed hillsides of Turkey, in a campaign to capture the Dardanelle Strait, a strategic zone seen as critical for control in World War I.
An estimated 131,000 people died there - 87,000 Turks and 44,000 from the allies, including 2721 Kiwis. It was a tragic waste of young life and seems so wrong - all those Turks defending their homes; all our great-grandfathers and uncles who died so far from their homes.
I visited Gallipoli a few years ago and the landscape is telling. It is raw country with unprotected sharp edges, little vegetation ... limited cover. It was heartbreaking to hear the stories of how the Turks would call out and beg for the officers to stop sending the young soldiers over as they would be just shot in the clearings - the Turks had no choice but to defend themselves.
So many stories of bravery, too - but at what cost? I was the mother of one young son when I visited Turkey - now two - but regardless of being a parent, how anyone could do anything but shed tears when reading the words of Turkey's first president Mustafa Kemal Ataturk on site at Gallipoli:
"Those heroes that shed their blood and lost their lives, you are now lying in the soil of a friendly country, therefore rest in peace.
"There is no difference between the Johnnies and the Mehmets to us where they lie side by side here in this country of ours. You, the mothers, who sent their sons from faraway countries, wipe away your tears; your sons are now lying in our bosom and are in peace. After having lost their lives on this land they have become our sons as well."
We say that we show our respects on Anzac Day to those who died fighting for freedom, fighting for democracy, fighting for the rights we now take for granted in modern New Zealand. What would those young soldiers think of the modern warfare, the use of drones, the acceptance of "collateral damage" claimed as necessary by world leaders, and the scaremongering about the threat of terrorism used to justify the undermining of privacy through unwarranted surveillance?
Closer to home, what would they think of the revelations that our GCSB provided information to the Bangladesh Government that may have been used in human rights abuses, including torture?
Would they not be disappointed that, even though 100 years have passed, we still don't seem to value human life and human rights? Why are we repeating the mistakes of the past? Hasn't the time for diplomacy and non-violent approaches come?
It is hard to make a positive difference in places with long and complex histories and the Middle East has more than its share. But one way we can truly help as a country is to take more refugees. Our refugee intake has been static since 1987 - no increase at all.
To honour those who have died representing our country, lifting our refugee quota would be an investment in a peaceful future - that would be the honourable thing to do.
-Nicola Young has worked both in the Government and private sectors in Australia and NZ. She currently works from home in Taranaki for a global consultancy. Educated at Wanganui Girls' College, she has a science degree and is the mother of two boys. These views are her own.
