Tour in England s'il vous plait

A cyclist rides the official route through West Tanfield, England, where residents of the village have created a display for the Tour De France, which starts in Leeds, west Yorkshire, on Saturday. Tour de France fever has hit the Yorkshire Dales, with yellow bicycles appearing in hedgerows, outside pubs and in people's front gardens along the route. PHOTO/AP

Depressed - and, heaven knows, who wouldn't be? - by England's recent performances at football and cricket, it is time to focus on a sport at which we are likely to win.

Unfortunately, it is hard to identify one with any certainty. Andy Murray won at Wimbledon last year; that was encouraging but might only prove a flash in the pan.

British crews normally do well at Henley, but the sight of the river could revive memories of Oxford's victory in the boat race - hardly something on which a civilised Englishman would wish to dwell.

The Americans have a good system. Their World Series involves only American teams, so they can sit back twanging their stars-and-stripes braces and congratulating themselves on supplying the champions without any risk of it going wrong.

Until the Brits do something of that sort, we will have to find a sport where England is at the top and hope for the best.

I know - cycling!

A glance at the sporting calendar tells me that the Tour de France is imminent. Excellent, I will cross the Channel and watch the start - France is very pleasant at this time of year and sitting in a cafe with a glass of the local wine watching the cyclists limber up sounds just the ticket.

I wonder where it will be. The Loire would be nice, a glass or two of Chinon, perhaps - a red wine served cold and very refreshing it is, too.

But, then again, the heavier wines of the south could be attractive. As the cyclists struggle off across the hills one could retire to a deck chair and contemplate their efforts with one's eyes closed.

Well, let's Google the race and see which it is to be. Ah, yes ... Leeds. Now is that Leeds sur la Loire or Leeds de Provence. Hmm, that needs a closer look. No - it's Leeds in Yorkshire. The rating of Yorkshire wines? A little below the rating of those from the Loire or Bordeaux.

There is something rather strange about the Tour de France starting in Yorkshire.

Yes, I know that French businessmen are fleeing Mr Hollande like aristocrats running from the guillotine and that London is abuzz with French voices as the wretched exiles establish themselves here to wait for a new Napoleon. But the Tour de France should surely stay in France.

The cynics say that running part of the tour in England is an attempt to maximise sponsorship. The naive believe that the change is a sportsmanlike recognition of recent British triumphs. But both agree that it must be a good reason which has made the tour betray its own name.

But it is here that their knowledge of language has let them down. Like "of" in English, the French "de" can point to origin not possession.

John of Gaunt did not belong to Ghent, he was merely born there. Henry V was known as Harry of Monmouth for the same reason. Now translate "Tour de France" with that in mind and you will see that it means the tour was once held in France (a bit like the artist formerly known as Prince). There is no reason why it should go on being held there.

So in a year or two we can look forward to the Tour de France en Angleterre, as it will probably be known. I expect they will have dropped the French stages by then and it will have become a wholly English event - an important staple of the English sporting calendar, well run, well sponsored and usually won by an Englishman.

An improvement all round, you might think. I will miss the wine, though.

Before retiring, John Watson was a partner in an international law firm. He now writes from Islington, London.