Touched by an Angel: Climbing back on a moving world

"The body needs food but the mind needs people." From Two Old Women by Velma Wallis

My Angels laugh, as they always know what I need next, even if I am not so sure.
This book found me.

Velma Wallis was born and raised in a remote Alaskan village near Fort Yukon, a place that could only be accessed by riverboat, airplane, snowmobile or dogsled.

At 13, when her father died, she stayed out of school to help her mother with the household, later surprising her family and friends by leaving home and living an independent lifestyle in a cabin her father had built, perfecting her trapping, hunting and fishing skills, living on what she provided for herself.

Velma's experiences led to writing this tribal legend, Two Old Women, with disarming simplicity, grace and simple elegance.

Since my last column, in June 2021, I had sort of given up. I had taken myself away from the outward expression of my life and feeling my body aching and hurting when I did things, I rested more.

I carried a walking stick to help me through the tiredness and then in case something happened. I parked close to places I needed to go. I ate comfort food without thinking, it simply felt good. I woke during the long nights and wondered how long this will last.

The world went on around me, it was as if I was not there. I belonged to nothing, heard from very few people and didn't contact others. I even thought my angels had moved on.

As I read this book powerful themes emerged, especially when one of the two old women said, "They think that we are too old and useless. They forget that we too have earned the right to live! So, I say if we are going to die, my friend, let us die trying, not sitting."

So, this is me, "not sitting" and waiting for things to be different for me. No longer staring into space, wondering what to do next, trying to keep my sense of humour because so many things had fallen apart.

This is me acknowledging my mind needs people and moving slowly and tentatively back into a community I had withdrawn from, searching for my strength and facing fears I didn't realise existed.

I hear the gentle rustle of angel wings and change was in the air. I know family needed to move on with their lives. Young people move faster, and some prefer to do this without extra burdens.

This is me, focusing on the things I know and doing the things I can do. Salvaging what I can, using my lifetime of gathering skills and knowledge to do a little more each day.

My angels chuckle as I claim my place in the world. I'm not helpless, I have much to offer, and so do you, my friends. Arohanui.