Ref column: Recent abuse of officials must stop

On my occasional visits to school classrooms these days, I usually start the day with a discussion about impulse management.

This concept has been around since civilisation first developed, but an American educator by the name of Marvin Marshall has developed a very sensible approach to teaching children how to manage their impulses.

Marshall maintains children who have difficulty with their impulsive behaviour are victims of their impulses and can be taught how to be in control of rather than being the victim.
Just within the last couple of weeks, a number of rugby referees have been subjected to abuse, both on and off the field.

We have seen players swearing at and verbally abusing referees and then destroying property beside the field and in the changing rooms after being red carded for their abuse – as well as ripping up the referee's red card!

Team coaches and players on the reserves bench have been abusing referees and assistant referees by constantly arguing about decisions that don't go their way.

They yell out at the referee and wave their arms about on the sidelines like angry children.

Even worse was the woman spectator who ambushed the referee after a schoolboy game with a shrieking tirade of abuse, and that was after the team she was supporting had won – one shudders to think what she might have done had her team lost.

Sideline supporters are not immune to yelling out abuse to referees from the safety of the sideline either.

There is a clear distinction between advice and abuse here.

While the referee doesn't always hear this, it can undermine his or her authority on the field and incite players to do silly things.

All of these people - players, team officials and spectators - are victims of their impulses.

They simply lack the basic control of their emotions and let this lack of control get the better of them.

The most obvious effect of this abuse of match officials is the dwindling number of people willing to step up and take on this valuable role in rugby.

This season, not one single new recruit has joined the ranks of the referees' association.

For a variety of reasons, a number of very experienced ones are no longer available either.

A significant number of those current referees, who do turn out week after week to ensure there is a game to play and watch, are what NZ Rugby calls PMS – pale, male, and stale.

They carry on because they love the game, but eventually old man age must catch up with us all.

How can we deal with this issue? I recently heard from one school principal how he once dealt with an abusive spectator by placing the ribbon with the whistle on it around the head of said spectator and walking off.

Needless to say, the spectator declined to go on the field and other spectators chased after the principal, imploring him to come back and carry on refereeing the game.

Better still was the story about the same principal's grandfather who famously sat down on the ball and refused to give it back to the players to carry on playing until they had given him an assurance they would stop fighting and play rugby.

That story made headlines in the Taranaki newspapers of the day.

In order to maintain their composure, referees should try and avoid direct confrontation with abusers.

Team captains have an important role here as they can be the link between errant players, abrasive team personnel and spectators.

If a player is causing a problem on the field, the first action for the referee to consider is to call the captain and the offending player over and explain that the unruly behaviour is not helping the player or his team, then ask the captain to speak to the player about changing his attitude.

Otherwise, the referee may have to escalate his approach to the issue.

I like the word "escalate", because it gives the player a choice – either change the offending behaviour or risk being sent from the field.

I have yet to meet a player who would rather be on the sideline than on the field, so this approach actually helps the player if he so chooses.

Dealing with unruly coaches and spectators can be done in a similar fashion.

The referee should stop the game and inform the captain what or who is the problem, and ask him to go to the sideline and ask the offender (s) to cease hostilities.

I recently witnessed a very proactive captain at Tairua on the Coromandel "politely" chastise his coach for calling out to the referee during the game – what a refreshing display of leadership.

He recognised the coach's actions were not helping the team at all.

The Wanganui Rugby Football Union is very supportive of referees and is to be applauded for this support.

Union officers are quick to address any issues, once they come to their attention.

Clubs could take more responsibility for maintaining a safe environment for match officials at their grounds as well as the WRFU.

This should include a clearly identified club official walking around the ground to make sure spectators manage their impulses and don't abuse officials.

Some do make an effort but a more formal approach would help to reassure match officials they can get on with the job of officiating fairly with enjoyment rather than trepidation.