MPs, solo parents have a lot in common

I have been starting a rumour and circulating it among the cognoscenti, satirista and media mavens. Parallel with the current merging of various government departments, there is a plan being hatched by an elite group of redundant policy experts to smuggle legislation into Parliament that would merge the functions of Work and Income with the Remuneration Authority. (The small band of elite ex-bureaucrats have been secretly filmed, camouflaged in their three piece pinstriped suits, dashing between buildings on The Terrace, throwing flaming documents at parking meters and firing rhetorical questions at pedestrians)

Both the Remuneration Authority and Work and Income oversee decisions about entitlements and payments to those supported by taxpayers so a merger such as this makes good sense. Members of Parliament and solo parents have a lot in common. Although one lot spend a lot of time blaming the other for not doing their bit both rely on the state to support them. Any pay rises or perks granted to one should also be given to the other.

Solo parents are being told they must be out seeking work once their child starts school and will be penalised for having more children. Where's the call for MPs who foist yet another failed social experiment on the nation to be stopped from giving birth to bad ideas. Mind you, it is not always easy to tell whether a new policy initiative will grow up to be simply mad or bad until it has reached the age of 5 reviews. As a nation we seem to be very good at repeating the well-researched mistakes of other countries with a kind of naive "she'll be right" wave to the warning signs.

MPs feel justified in accepting pay rises well above those being granted to those on benefits, whose welfare they have a duty to represent. If MPs can decide the level of their perks, why not allow solo parents and unemployed people to do it too - the money all comes from the pockets of taxpayers.

Where are the free flights all over the country for solo parents launching a campaign to try to find a suitable partner who will help with the kids? Surely this would save taxpayers money in the long run? The kind of entertainment allowance provided to our MPs would be very helpful on a blind date with a potential Mr or Mrs Right. Ideally solo parents would be entitled to an office and paid administrator to manage their affairs plus meal and taxi chits.

The merger of both categories of state-funded beneficiaries into one group would allow for expansion of the 90-day employment trial to cover MPs. If, after 90 days in office they are found to have done nothing then they should be shown the door. Unelected list MPs should also be shown the door, as they have not been interviewed (voting) by taxpayers for the job. NB: Anyone who has been interviewed by Work and Income will know the degree of questioning required before being entitled to receive a benefit.

Groups of solo parents should be funded, as are the annual two-week Speaker's Tours for MPs, so they too can travel business class to Europe or somewhere warm with good shopping to study first-hand the lives of their peers and colleagues in far-flung countries. It would also be cheaper as none of them would be taking a taxpayer-funded spouse with them.

Terry Sarten is a writer, musician, social worker, life member of the Satirista with a passion for social justice. Feedback email: tgs@inspire.net.nz