Learning to be a gracious winner

The last few weeks have been filled with some unexpected surprises. Since my last column I have been to Auckland to participate in the Women of Influence Awards as a finalist. Being selected in the line up of what are considered to be the 100 most influential women in the country for 2016 is quite something. Many people have asked me how this happens, who decides, and what determines the scope of influence.
Of course, these are questions I cannot answer, but what I do know is that I have worked hard in my life to get to where I am, and if this is recognised by other folk as being important and influential, then I'm happy with that. My measure of success follows the Ralph Waldo Emerson school of thought, "to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived, this is to have succeeded".
Being given an accolade gives one opportunity to reflect, and there certainly isn't anything about my life that I would change, particularly the importance of community work, and what it means to make a difference at a grass roots level. However, one thing I have been thinking about is how we could do better at celebrating our collective successes. In all my years of working with women, one thing I have observed is how reticent most women are when it comes to accepting compliments about themselves. We often rebut a compliment with a remark like "oh, this old thing, it's second-hand" or "I'm no more special than anyone", or "it was a team effort". When really, all we need to do is say "thank you" and smile graciously. I believe that if we focus some time on teaching young people, especially young women, to accept compliments with grace, that we would go some way toward improving our confidence as adults. Being acknowledged for what we do, or for the gifts we possess never gets tiring, and we are never too old to understand that by being in the world we make it a better place.
I am fortunate to meet some fascinating women during the course of my work, and I learn something from each and every one of them, especially the ones who find themselves lingering in life's dark places. At the Women of Influence Awards dinner there were all manner of women unafraid and unabashed in letting their lights shine. It really was something to be in that kind of energy. And while I have no aspirations to succeed internationally in the business world, like Helen Robinson who took out the overall title, what I have been reminded of is the importance of acknowledging my own worth, and the achievements I have worked hard for. Being confident breeds all kinds of success, it is infectious, and it role models to other women that anything is possible when you set your heart and mind to it. Surrounding ourselves with like-minded people is important, and learning to respect difference helps us to understand ourselves. Honouring the legacy of others is important too. For me that means continuing to wave the flag for women, just like our suffragette sisters did. Thank you to every one who has walked with me, or who has crossed my path in this lifetime thus far. I have learned something about myself from each and every one of you, whether as friend or foe. To all who have congratulated me on my awards success, thank you. There is more to come as I have also been honoured with a Local Hero award in the Manawatu region as part of the New Zealander of the Year Awards. My humble thanks to whoever nominated me.