Kiwis and Americans - different and still the same

A young woman of no more than 20 and I were chatting recently about everything and nothing at all. I think it was my accent that kept the conversation going. Let's call my new acquaintance Lucy. Lucy asked me about living and working in New York City and after describing marvellous moments there, she asked, "Are they the same as us?"

What a beautifully simple question that made me pause. I needed to stop and actually think how I would respond. My comment was, 'Yes and no!" I had to explain that yes we are the same in the similar wants and needs we desire - food, clothing, shelter, love, safety, freedom, education.

But, there is also a difference and I stopped to wonder, am I answering this question as an American or as a New Zealander?

As an American, I thought about the riots and protests in Charlottesville, Boston and Phoenix and a racial divide that I did not experience growing up. I grew up in a multicultural environment that my parents and teachers embraced. I struggle to comprehend how my fellow Americans could elect a president who, I believe, is not fit for office and is dividing the country I grew up in. A place that now seems foreign to me. Are we different in our desire for freedom of speech? No.

My mind went back to my time in New York City when I worked for an international NGO that helped homeless and runaway children based in Times Square. I am grateful for my experiences there and was able to walk to work and have the chance to share in a sense of community, looking after neighbours and friends. Then, yes we are the same.

As a Kiwi, I thought that we are not the same. Americans are different and have a confidence and often a brashness (different to Australians) almost like a deserved arrogance. They have a thriving economy, a high dollar, brilliant students, a plethora of entrepreneurs, yet struggle to provide affordable health care and have way too many people who do not have enough to eat.

In recognising these contrasts and attempting to comprehend the differences in the interesting world we live in, how do we celebrate this diversity? How do we as Kiwis try to help Americans struggling to understand equality? What can we learn to make sure New Zealand does not go down a similar path since I am distraught by what's happening in the country of my birth.

Maybe we just have to start here and then help spread the word - building momentum that can begin in Whanganui and move beyond.

Let's start with a mihi, pepeha or whakapapa when introducing ourselves by stating where we come from and then what value we will add to the conversation. I am not interested in how long you have lived in Whanganui, I want to know what we can do together to make this a better place. And, once we make this a better place, let's move up the river, over the hills or to any other place to help them.

Lucy's question lingers and I will spend a bit more time thinking about this but will not change my answer since I believe that we are different. And, we are not! I just think we can do better!