Manners have changed a lot over the years, and in some instances this is a good thing. Hooray that some old-fashioned manners have long gone (eg, "children must not speak unless spoken to first") but it seems that some of the good ones have gone too.
For instance, after years of seeing young people not offer their seat to the elderly and pregnant women on Sydney public transport, I was getting ready to drag them off the seat myself.
Also in Sydney, I had to remember that different locations meant different manners. For example, when at a lift I would often absent-mindedly wait for the few men ahead of me to get in first. It took me a while to register that I was dealing with gentlemen and they were waiting for me to get in first. Other locations meant some dancing, gymnastics and athletic prowess to get anywhere near the inside of a lift at lunchtime.
No matter how much of a feminist I claim to be, I still value a gentleman. I am married to one and I want my boys to be raised as gentlemen. So doors are opened for me in my house, my husband walks on the outside when we go down the street on a rainy day and waits for women to be seated at a table before he sits.
I plan to role-model, inspire, nag and pester my children to use their manners, as ultimately this will serve them well in life.
When you use manners, it shows you to be a kind, respectful and considerate person. It means you care about others and are willing to get along with them. I think we have all become a little more "me" focused nowadays and this does not seem to be serving the collective society at all well.
Ultimately, we are social creatures who function best in a cohesive community. Manners are the social concrete that bonds us all together.
It certainly made me feel happier when I saw that public display of care and compassion in the funeral.
So if you take the time to show your good manners it tells people you care about and respect them. What a great way to introduce more positivity into your relationships.
