Helpful advice for new mums

Liza Iliffe Photo/File

We've been talking about the father's role in parenting over the past couple of weeks, so it's a good time to think about mothers this week.

Here at Skip, we use a number of resources and workshops from The Parenting Place, a wonderful source of parenting information and support started by Ian and Mary Grant many years ago.

Something we hear often from new parents is that they wish that there was a manual they could refer to that would give instructions on how to parent this new little person that suddenly takes over their lives, so here's a great article for mums that we've borrowed from The Parenting Place.

Time takes on a whole new meaning when a new baby arrives in the home - suddenly there doesn't seem to be enough of it and your own needs take lowest priority.

Chances are you'll look back at your life before children and wonder what you did all day. How did you fill your time without the endless round of feeds, nappies and songs?

It's easy to get so immersed in motherhood in those first few months that you forget about your own needs. But caring for your precious baby properly means caring for yourself as well. Continually denying yourself and your needs is not the sign of a devoted parent, it's the sign of a budding martyr complex. If you want to raise a child who is assertive about what he/she needs, start by setting the best of examples.

To get the most out of parenthood you may need to learn some new ways of thinking about self-care. Your new life requires high levels of energy and optimism. Maintaining them means looking after your body, mind and soul - not just your baby.

It's worth taking a few moments to understand how your brain and body work together to influence your mood and ability to cope as a new parent. The following facts may not be new, but they take on an added significance when sleep deprivation leaves your body in need of some serious maintenance.

Looking after yourself

Skipping breakfast and/or lunch lowers your blood glucose level, causing your adrenal gland to release adrenalin and cortisol. Your brain function will decrease, you will feel tense and on edge.

A protein-rich breakfast with some complex carbohydrates will set you up well for the day, boosting tyrosine levels and providing a sustained energy source. Caffeine and sugar on an empty stomach can leave your blood glucose lower than where you started, leaving you tired and irritable.

Lack of exposure to sunshine is linked to low serotonin, dopamine, and vitamin D levels. This can lead to a low mood, lack of motivation and concentration.

Exercise releases endorphins, and if taken regularly will lower your adrenalin and cortisol levels.

The company of emotionally-secure adults activates natural opioids in the brain. Get around these people regularly - before you feel lonely and strung out. Calming activities cause your brain to release oxytocin, which inhibits the release of stress chemicals.

What is your body trying to tell you? Feed it well, take it outside and exercise it regularly, do nice things with nice people as often as you can, and you shouldn't have too many problems.

And finally, it might help to think of your new role as an employment situation - there is no boss, only one very demanding client.

Just as you would at work, it's important to take fuel breaks, and to have some time when you can completely switch off (when baby's asleep or you have a babysitter of course). Not many people would apply for a job with no leave entitlements and a 24-hour working day.

For more parenting tips and strategies contact Liza or Lynette at S.K.I.P (Strategies for Kids and Information for Parents) phone or text 027 626 1404, or email skipwanganui@xtra.co.nz