The producer and teacher chose the picturesque Pacific Road Beach at Te Arai for their relaxed and fun-filled day.
Hayley, a film, television and theatre producer, met Connor, an English and media studies secondary school teacher, through mutual friends as they navigated the early stages of their relationship attending house parties.
It wasn’t until years later, at a movie, when close friends had engineered for them to be sitting together, that the realisation of love hit home.
“We went to see The Secret Life of Pets as a group, our friends sneakily sat us together and Hayley spent the whole time laughing, knee-slapping and eating my Skittles,” says Connor. The pair began dating and relocated to Amsterdam six months later.
The couple eventually married on a summer’s day in January at Te Arai, surrounded by their closest friends and family, including their son, Aila.
THE VISION
Hayley: To party! We wanted the day to feel like us — relaxed, but also special. It was super important that all our loved ones and their families felt comfortable and could just have a good time.
THE CEREMONY
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Advertise with NZME.Hayley: We got married at Pacific Rd Beach, Te Arai. Our very special friend Laura Stephenson was our celebrant and was incredible. As a team, we decided to set the ceremony up in a circle, with Connor’s family tapa cloth in the middle for us three to stand on, then wooden benches in a circle surrounding us for guests to sit on and stand around. We rotated four times during the ceremony so everyone could see us from all angles. It felt intimate and personal, and the high tide and sunshine made it feel very summery. Rebekah and Garth from Taylor & Co in Mangawhai jumped on board as our on-the-day co-ordinator and furniture hire company. They went above and beyond, working behind the scenes to make sure everything kept flowing along nicely.
THE LOCATION
Connor: Hayley had always dreamt of getting married on a beach. Her mum passed away when she was young and her ashes were scattered at her family’s favourite beach spot. Naturally, she always felt close to her mum when at the beach or in the water.
Hayley: Connor wasn’t so convinced about a beach wedding at first. But he loves the beach and swimming too, and once we’d visited Te Arai again and visualised it all, he was sold. We wanted to get married somewhere out of Auckland so everyone could have a weekend away, or if they didn’t have the time or money to stay for the weekend, the drive wasn’t too far.
THE PLANNING
Connor: We planned it all ourselves, which was a huge task to take on. There were many late nights and weekends in spreadsheets and emails, and researching on Instagram, Pinterest and TikTok. The planning was mostly enjoyable and came naturally to Hayley as it’s pretty similar to what she does for work, but man, sometimes our brains just wanted a night off from thinking about the wedding. There were many tears, arguments, laughs and fun along the way. We made a really solid team.
Hayley: Our friend and talented graphic designer Bryson Naik designed our Save the Date and invitations, we loved them so much.
Hayley: The final month of prep was the most stressful, we felt like we’d left a lot of the sourcing and transporting to the last minute and got quite overwhelmed by how much there was to do and how little time we had left. Getting wedding admin done with a baby around was hard. Let’s say we had a pretty decent mental breakdown and then we finally asked our friends and family for help (rather than trying to be superheroes and juggle it all). We had amazing support from everyone helping us install the tent, pack our extra furniture and decorations, paint and build our bar and icecream stall, arrange flowers, install plants, run the bar, bake, and collect decorations and fans.
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Advertise with NZME.Hayley: It was pouring down the day before our wedding too. We were convinced we’d be getting married in a tent in the middle of a muddy swamp. By some miracle, it cleared in the morning, but there was a whole lot of water to clear from the ground. We have vivid memories of our family and friends pumping water from the ground and rushing around to section off the muddy parts. They made it look amazing. Connor’s family went above and beyond, making sure the land was returned to exactly how we found it.
THE RINGS
Hayley: Connor asked his friend for a jeweller recommendation when he was secretly planning to propose a couple of years ago. David Keefe, based in New Lynn, was his chosen jeweller. He did a beautiful job of designing a ring that really felt like me, a green tourmaline solitaire cut stone with a simple gold band. Designing a wedding band that worked with the engagement ring was tough. We wanted it to feel just as special but not distract from the beauty of the wedding ring. We found a nice balance with a simple gold band and diamonds. Connor’s wedding band is a chunky gold band that reminded him a lot of his dad’s wedding band. Simple but special.
THE DRESS
Hayley: My first wedding dress try-on was super special as it was the day I asked my friends and sisters to be my bridesmaids. The dresses I tried on were pretty underwhelming as they felt structured and rigid and a bit too classic wedding for my liking, they didn’t feel right for me and had me overthinking. I kept researching and came across Clara Bridal when I was Google searching for wedding budget templates, as she had a blog post talking about it. I came across her Lara dress and became a little obsessed with it ... Instagram knew it too as it kept advertising it to me.
Hayley: I booked a try-on session at her studio and this time decided to go on my own (with my mum’s veil in tow) so I could build my confidence in the dress and connect with the dressmaker. Clara was so chill, kind, professional and clearly passionate about what she does. She welcomed my sisters, friend and second mum Sandra in for fittings where we worked on making the dress feel more and more like me. Clara made me feel confident as a first-time bride who’d recently had a baby and therefore a body that had changed in many (special) ways.
Hayley: I wore my mum’s original veil. We swapped the headband and fake flowers for a clip and wore the comfiest chunky wedge shoes from Zara.
THE BRIDESMAIDS
Hayley: I wanted my bridesmaids to feel as comfortable and confident as possible, so I encouraged them all to find dresses they liked that fit within a colour palette I chose and were made of a silky material. They all chose different colours, and together they complimented each other so perfectly. We sourced these from Billy J, Ruby (hired), Shine On and Miss Crabb (from Trade Me). They all carried a bridal bouquet and a handwoven ili (Sāmoan fan), gifted to them by me earlier in the day.
THE SUIT
Hayley: For the ceremony, Connor and his groomsmen all wore the same natural-coloured linen short-sleeved shirt from AS Colour. Connor’s shirt was adorned with his late grandmother Tala’s ula (necklace), while the others carried a handwoven ili , gifted to them by Connor earlier in the day. The groomsmen wore a brown i’e faitaga (traditional Samoan formal lavalava) from Otahuhu shops, along with matching sandals from The Warehouse. Connor wore the same brown i’e faitaga underneath a siapo (Sāmoan tapa) that was gifted to him by his Aunties and was fastened around his waist. It was later removed at the reception, so he had more room to move when he hit the dance floor.
THE BEAUTY
Hayley: I was really happy with the whole glam look as it was simple but special. I like that I still felt like me on my wedding day, not a version of myself that is unrecognisable from my day-to-day. Alana Menell from The Beauty Lab in Mangawhai did our makeup, she was amazing! An old school friend of mine recommended her. So cool, calm and collected on the day and made us look all glowy and lovely.
Hayley: Lauren McCombe from Lauren Jo’al Hair in Waipu did our hair, she was incredible too! A netball friend of mine recommended her as they’re sisters. She brought such a fun, creative energy to our day. My brief to both of them was fairly straightforward — natural, glowy and sun-kissed. We had a bunch of reference pictures of ourselves and inspiration we’d sourced online to help them both plan for the day.
Hayley: I had a fake tan at Status Glow in Manukau, their team was so lovely and made me feel really comfortable. They had a bridal package where I had a trial tan around Christmas time, and then the real deal the week of the wedding. I had a manicure and pedicure done with Connor’s amazing mum, Michelle, a couple of days before the wedding at PreciousNail in Onehunga. I went for a pearly nail polish which was inspired by my makeup artist’s nails I’d spotted at our makeup trial for my hen’s do. It went perfectly with the pearl earrings I wore that were from my sister.
THE FLOWERS
Hayley: Our florist was Claire Cave from Flora and Foal Farm in Mata, Whangārei. She was incredible! A recommendation from my cousins who own and run PlantHouse (and the land we had our reception on). She created beautiful bouquets for myself and the bridesmaids and after our wedding I asked her to dry and lay out my bridal bouquet so I could frame it and hang it up at home. Claire also provided all the flowers for the tables but unfortunately after my sisters had spent a good couple of hours arranging them, we came back in the morning to find they’d frozen over and died in the chiller fridge we hired. I just laughed! Our friends and wedding day co-ordinator raced around to source flowers from gardens locally, they made it look like nothing had gone wrong — absolute legends.
THE RECEPTION
Hayley: The party (we ditched the word reception) was on my cousins’ land, a spot we have spent a couple of summers on having our own mini-festival with friends. We wanted to find a place that we could completely customise and make it feel like a bit of a festival, with a big tent, food trucks, an outdoor bar and games. We set up a huge stretch tent and dance floor from Schupepe tents with help from our family and friends. Our friend Ezra was our amazing MC, he kept the night flowing seamlessly with Connor’s Uncle DJ Monte keeping the dancefloor vibes up all night. Speeches were short and sweet — Connor’s Aunty, our parents, siblings and us to finish.
Hayley: We did a huge group electric slide dance to Before I Let Go (Frankie Beverly and Maze original, and Beyonce cover), a whole bunch of our family and friends had learned it in the lead-up to the wedding. We partied until 5am and the after-party was at our friends’ house. It was so nice to keep talking and dancing with everyone, we were too excited to go to sleep. Then we had a cruisy beach day with everyone the next day, before returning to the party venue to start cleaning up.
Hayley: As the party was on private land it meant that there were no limitations! Our family and friends were so supportive, we don’t quite ever know how we’ll repay them for their generosity.
THE FOOD
Hayley: The quality (and quantity) of food was very important, especially as we had to bring in our own vendors. We tried to cater to the rather wide range of diverse tastes among our guests. We had amazing grazing platters and fresh fruit from family and friends, barbecue meats and salads from Rob Aylwin and Zsofi Olah, chop suey and taro from Connor’s family, Italian pizzas from Al Volo, real fruit icecream from Lot 19.
Hayley: Our bar was a DIY setup with a Mangawhai Hireworks chiller trailer (we also hired toilets from them), stocked up with drinks from SuperLiquor Mangawhai and run by Connor’s niece and nephew.
THE CAKE
Hayley: Our beautiful friend and owner of Lot Nineteen, Rebecca Dalliessi, designed and made our wedding cakes. She had decided long ago before Connor and I met that she was going to be making my wedding cake. We did a cake test with her a few months before the wedding and settled on three separate cakes (rather than tiers) and three different flavours because we couldn’t agree on one. A lemon cake, a peach-passionfruit cake and a carrot cake! They looked and tasted incredible.
THE PHOTOS
Hayley: We have always been a fan of our friend Geoffrey Matautia and his photography. The authentic perspectives he captures of people and their environments resonated with both of us, in particular the family portraits series he did in South Auckland. It gave us faith that he’d capture our authentic selves on our special day. He’s a lovely human being and his assistant Hele Ikimotu also provided alternate perspectives that also gave us some classic behind-the-scenes moments.
THE DAY
Hayley: It was a blur. It happened exactly the way we intended it to — but it still went way faster than we had anticipated. We’re both not used to being so centrally the “guests of honour”, so it did take some adjusting throughout the day, having to cut conversations short and make sure we rotate ourselves amongst guests. But most importantly, we smiled, we cried, we laughed, all surrounded by the people we love most in this world. It was also special to have our Aila with us, despite his not quite grasping the change in regular programming.
THE MOMENTS
Hayley: For Connor, the most memorable thing besides the ceremony was the surprise taualuga (Sāmoan dance at significant events). I performed for him and his family. I had secretly practised with his cousin Leaisa, months before the wedding and Connor was absolutely speechless when the Sāmoan music started and I turned around with a flower in my ear. He was so stunned he almost forgot to come up and join me as is customary with a taualuga.
ANY TIPS
Hayley: Have the wedding that you always wanted, there’s no particular way you have to get married, it can be as simple or as extravagant as you wish, just as long as it feels right to you. A friend of ours gave such simple advice the week of our wedding; in the lead-up to the wedding you’re the hosts, the planners, thinking of everyone else and how they will enjoy your wedding. On the day of your wedding, you two become the guests of honour, everyone is there to make sure you have the best day of your lives.
Special days, special moments.
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