In this special series, guest writer Dr Libby Weaver shares her health insights.
With my most recent birthday being my 50th, I barely paused.
Sure, I celebrated with my high school besties – who were turning or had turned 50 as well – but we all commented that we felt
There’s something about turning 40 that makes many people pause. Maybe it’s because we’ve lived long enough to have real perspective – wait for 50 – it’s even better. Or maybe it’s the way society has framed ageing – especially for women – as something to be resisted rather than embraced. Whatever the reason, it seems that hitting this milestone can feel like a reckoning.
Forty-ish tends to be when we notice some changes that were unlikely to have been considerations in our 20s or 30s. Skin might start telling new stories, energy may shift, and, in some cases, the body might behave in ways not entirely recognisable.
It’s easy to fall into the trap of believing that it just must be how it is now. That we’re simply meant to accept any sluggishness as a “normal” part of ageing. But – and I wish I could shout this from the rooftops so all women could hear it – common does not mean normal. If, at any age, things are no longer functioning the way they did, or your energy isn’t what it used to be, I encourage you to see that as your body asking for something to change, and investigate what might be driving those symptoms. When we do this, we usually resolve more than just those new symptoms – we learn so much more about ourselves than we would have if we didn’t explore what was driving them.
Of course, we can’t fight our biology – ageing is inevitable and also a great big gift. So what if, instead of fighting against it, we reframed what’s happening? What if 40ish wasn’t a turning point into resignation, but a powerful transition into a new kind of wisdom – one where we truly understand our bodies and know how to support them?
Start with your skin
For many women, the first sign of change is in their skin. The fine lines that once faded after a good night’s sleep start to settle in and stretch marks from pregnancies or weight fluctuations seem to stand out more than before. This isn’t just about time passing – it’s about what’s happening beneath the surface. Our body’s ability to produce collagen and elastin slows down but instead of resenting this, try seeing it as a prompt to include more vitamin C-rich foods in what you’re eating, given this vitamin’s crucial role in collagen health. And stretch marks might be a call for more zinc. Yet for some, the cumulative effects of some genuinely tough times can start to become more visible.
But here’s where perspective comes in. Those laughter lines? They’re proof of decades of joy – perhaps intertwined with times of pain. The stretch marks? Evidence of a body that has carried us through different seasons of life. Instead of seeing these changes as flaws, what if we saw them as markers of resilience? That’s not to say we can’t support our skin health – our skin thrives on good nutrition, hydration and plenty of antioxidants. Yet, it’s about shifting our mindset from self-criticism to self-appreciation.
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Advertise with NZME.Consider hormonal shifts
By the time we reach our forties, some women start noticing subtle (or not-so-subtle) changes in their menstrual cycle. Periods can become heavier, shorter, irregular. Mood swings might feel more intense. For some, sleep becomes more disrupted than it used to be, and some women begin experiencing the early flickers of hot flushes.
Hormonal shifts like these don’t happen in isolation. They’re intertwined with stress, how we eat, liver function – and even how we process emotions. Our adrenal glands, which have spent years producing stress hormones, are now being called upon to help ease the transition into perimenopause. If they’re depleted from years of relentless pressure – too much to do, too little rest, always running on empty – the body can struggle to maintain inner balance. And when the body perceives stress, it can decide to hold on to energy reserves in the form of fat, often around the middle. It’s one reason why so many women feel frustrated when they seem to be gaining weight despite eating the same way they always have. The body is responding to hormonal shifts and stress signals, doing what it believes is best for survival. And yet, there are ways to support ourselves through this.
Supporting the liver is a great place to start, as it plays a crucial role in processing hormones. Eating plenty of leafy greens, cruciferous vegetables (broccoli, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts) and bitter foods like rocket and sour lemons can help encourage detoxification pathways and bile production. Reducing alcohol intake, which can place an extra burden on the liver, can also make a noticeable difference.
Move your muscles
Another shift that some women describe relates to their metabolism. From around the age of 30, we naturally begin to lose muscle mass unless we actively work to maintain it. Muscle is metabolically active, meaning the more we have, the more efficiently our bodies use energy. The less we have, the slower our metabolism becomes. Prioritising resistance training – whether that’s lifting weights, yoga, Pilates or simply using our bodies in functional ways like carrying groceries, luggage, or doing manual work – helps to counteract this loss and keep metabolism humming.
Food also plays a key role. Protein intake becomes particularly important, as protein helps to preserve muscle and keep us feeling fuller for longer. And rather than falling into restrictive dieting patterns, focusing on whole, nutrient-dense foods – plenty of vegetables, protein, nutritious fats, and high-fibre carbohydrates – will help fuel the body properly.
Prioritise emotional wellbeing
Beyond the physical changes, our forties can also bring a deeper awareness of our emotional wellbeing. Some women describe feeling a weight of growing responsibility – careers, family, ageing parents, finances. There’s often a sense of being stretched too thin, of holding everything together for everyone else. We can too easily lose touch with the privilege wrapped up in all of that. And yet, beneath it all, there’s an undercurrent of something deeper – a question that bubbles up in quiet moments: when do I get to do what I want?
This is a decade where women start to reclaim their time. Not all at once, and not without some internal resistance, but slowly and intentionally. It’s in the small choices – delegating what we don’t actually have to do, saying no to things that drain us, making space for the things that light us up. It’s the realisation that prioritising our own care isn’t selfish, it’s essential.
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Advertise with NZME.There’s no single roadmap for navigating this chapter, no one-size-fits-all solution. But the beauty of 40ish is that we finally start to understand that we don’t have to do things the way we always have. We can rewrite the rules. We can embrace what’s changing, support what needs care, and most importantly, step into this decade with the wisdom, strength and self-respect that only time can bring.
Dr Libby Weaver PhD is a nutritional biochemist, 13 times bestselling author and international keynote speaker. For more on supporting yourself inside and out visit Drlibby.com
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