Julie Legg was diagnosed with ADHD when she was 52 and says, finally, her life made sense. It’s been a lively life, starting with a “free-range” childhood in places like Kawau Island in the Hauraki Gulf, living in 23 different houses by the time she was 30, and jobs that have included everything from acting to photography.
The mother of 3 grown-up sons says being in the “gig economy” suits her.
When she received the ADHD diagnosis she finally realised why she had struggled with feeling “different” to peers and contemporaries all her life. Now, she has written a book described as “everything you need to know about recognising and diagnosing ADHD in women, and how to live a full and fulfilling life after.”
Here, she outlines three things you’ll find out in The Missing Piece and one insight she gained through writing and researching.
ADHD isn’t a new disorder, but it comes with a fresh perspective
ADHD diagnoses are soaring in numbers today but ADHD-like traits have been acknowledged and recorded for more than 200 years. A disorder resembling ADHD was documented as far back as 1798. German doctors identified what they termed “hyperkinetic disease” in the 1930s, a childhood condition characterised by issues with hyperactivity, following instructions and socialising with peers. In 1980 it was renamed as ADD, then further refined as ADHD in 1987. It was believed the disorder only affected children
As it turns out, that wasn’t the case. While some traits may appear to diminish with age, the ADHD brain continues to operate with challenging impairments throughout a person’s lifetime. It has been suggested that some GPs may have only become aware of adult ADHD in the past 15 years or so. The realisation that ADHD may present differently between the sexes is also a relatively recent development.
You don’t have to ‘bounce off the walls’ to be hyperactive
Hyperactivity is not the sole definer of ADHD, and even if hyperactivity was the predominant presentation type, it may not always present itself in stereotypical ways. It would be a misconception to believe that only boisterous boys can claim the title.
Hyperactivity can also present as over thinking, over talking, over sharing, interrupting, feeling restless, extreme impatience, or hyperfixating on a project, person or thought – to name just a few.
For many women, these ADHD traits may be observed as character traits – “She’s always been a chatterbox”, some may say. Others, who have mastered the art of masking, may even be considered “overly reserved”. ADHD is not a one-size-fits-all disorder. It is complex and can manifest in a plethora of ways. So, post-diagnosis, the next time someone unhelpfully says, “You don’t look like you have ADHD”, smile and hand them a copy of The Missing Piece!
An adult ADHD diagnosis isn’t the end, it’s a new beginning
After navigating their way through many years of life, an ADHD diagnosis for women can be validating. But it doesn’t, or shouldn’t, end there. Like a grieving process there may be disbelief, anger, and acceptance (in no particular order). Understanding that ADHD traits are likely to have had a huge impact on life choices, relationships, and one’s view on the world, can be a lot to take in.
Every woman will have her own journey to unravel and make sense of. We are not the same as our neurotypical counterparts – our uniqueness should be harnessed not hidden, and for some that may take some practice. Learning to love our authentic selves, embracing and celebrating our positives, recognising our triggers and how to respond to them, rather than react to them, can be lifechanging.
What I learnt when writing the book
In researching answers to my very many ADHD questions, even the obscure ones, I had so many light-bulb moments, the house was positively a-glow for months. Study findings and emerging scientific breakthroughs fed my brain, but the very personal life stories shared with me by more than 30 New Zealand women, also diagnosed as adults, fed my heart. I learnt I was not alone. There are many women out there who can understand and empathise with me.
I learnt more of the human spirit. There were women whose drive, passion and tenacity had catapulted them through their undiagnosed life, sidestepping obstacles or barraging through them regardless. There were those who had felt like a walking contradiction – a friend to everyone and no one, exhausted by masking, feeling bewildered and misunderstood. They had very different life journeys, yet so much in common. Like me, all had battled an invisible disorder they didn’t know they had. They were resilient, empathetic, passionate, and creative
