Selection for the Kiwis did nothing to soften the blow of losing last Sunday's NRL grand final for Shaun Kenny-Dowall.
The Roosters centre had enjoyed a breakthrough year, much like his side which finished dead last in 2009, and started to believe a premiership was possible. He was even more excited when they led 8-6 at halftime.
But the Dragons roared into life and scored 26 unanswered points in the second half to claim their first title since St George and Illawarra merged in 1999 and the Dragons' first since 1979.
"To be leading at halftime and lose the game in that way was heartbreaking," Kenny-Dowall admits.
"It's really hard knowing we had an awesome opportunity to win that game. Having a great year wasn't enough. We put all the hard work in and got so close but we still lost. That was the hardest thing."
Selection on Tuesday for the Kiwis did little to ease the pain but it will force him to take his mind off the grand final.
The 22-year-old flew into in Auckland yesterday to join the rest of the Kiwis squad as they prepare for the upcoming Four Nations against Australia, England and Papua New Guinea.
Kenny-Dowall was a certainty for the 23-man squad, especially after the enforced withdrawals of fellow centres Jerome Ropati (injury) and Steve Matai (suspension).
He scored 21 tries in 28 games playing at right centre this season, including a run of 13 tries in eight games in the second half of the year - striking up an impressive partnership with fellow Kiwi Sam Perrett, something Kiwis coach Stephen Kearney may look to continue for New Zealand.
Kenny-Dowall made his NRL debut for the Roosters in 2007 on the wing and played there until the arrival of new coach Brian Smith at the start of the year.
"Centre was always my preferred position and I played a lot there in the junior grades," he explains. "I was fortunate enough to get a start on the wing in first grade but I always wanted to go back into the centres.
"The first time I met Smithy [Brian Smith], he asked me what my preferred position was and I said centre. He said he would give me a go there in the off-season.
"I made a lot of mistakes early in the season and I did a lot of video work trying to read and understand the game better. I'm really happy it worked out the way it did."
It would be a measure of his success, then, if he never played wing again, although that's not always something in his control. He has the right build to play there, standing 1.9m tall and weighing 101kg, and a move to the second row could happen later in his career as his speed wanes.
Kenny-Dowall won't strictly be a debutant for the Kiwis, having played one test on the disastrous Kiwis tour of the UK and France in 2007, but will feel like a newcomer.
He was just 19 when he went away with New Zealand three years ago and found himself in the middle of disastrous results on the field as well as a power play off it, as skipper Roy Asotasi sought to overthrow coach Gary Kemble.
He scored a try in his debut against France in Paris but the match is better remembered for the fact the Kiwis nearly lost.
"I was still young then and had a lot to learn," he says.
"I was aware that, back then, I wasn't playing that well and wasn't very consistent at all."
Quite clearly, he is now.
NRL loss still grates
Shaun Kenny-Dowall. Photo / Getty Images
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