Maria de Silva was described as a modern-day Sir Galahad at her funeral yesterday for the way she championed the cause of the mentally ill like herself.
The Aotea Square fire victim's best friend, Raewyn Biel, told mourners Ms de Silva had set an example for others through her determination to learn more about her illness, borderline personality disorder.
The 53-year-old burned herself to death a week ago.
Ms Biel used the Sir Galahad reference to describe how Ms de Silva was "like a bulldozer" in her many causes, which included educating the public about her disorder and trying to set up a nationwide network of support groups for other sufferers.
Ms Biel said Ms de Silva's efforts had made other sufferers say, "If she can, I can. And many today are going on because of her example".
In the legends of the knights of the round table, Sir Galahad achieved the quest for the Holy Grail and was the "perfect knight" because of his courage, gentleness and courtesy.
Ms Biel said that despite some public perceptions "a lot of good things happen in mental health, and Maria was one of them".
The service was held at St Patrick's Cathedral in the city where Ms de Silva's parents had married. It was a Catholic Requiem Mass, as she had requested. She had changed her birth name of Mary Baker later in life.
Much reference was made to the hope that Ms de Silva would now find the peace that she could not find in the later years of her life.
Of farming stock, her love of animals remained from when she raised the best calves in the Waiuku district to the up to a dozen cats she kept at her Mangere home at the time of her death.
Schooled at Sacred Heart in Hamilton, she was a talented scholar and athlete, who represented Auckland at middle-distance running. She later qualified as a kindergarten teacher.
She spent many years overseas, in Britain, Germany and the United States. While overseas, Ms de Silva trained in opera and associated with Dame Kiri te Kanawa. She had also worked with Bosnian and Croatian refugees in the former Yugoslavia.
The disorder
* Borderline personality disorder is diagnosed when there is an instability in interpersonal relationships, self-image, mood swings and impulsive behaviour.
* The BPD research project in New York says it affects 2 per cent of the population.
* Sufferers feel empty, needy, moody and fear being alone or abandoned. In its chronic stages, it can lead to murder or suicide.
* It is difficult to treat.
* In the film Girl Interrupted, Winona Ryder starred as a girl suffering from the disorder.
Fire victim 'a modern-day Sir Galahad' seeking peace
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