In my last column I wrote about mother-of-five Pip, who had teamed up with a new man, Sean.
In a fury, Sean had pushed Pip to the ground, temporarily knocking her out. All this in front of the children.
The children's father, Graeme, was understandably worried about them; particularly as he and Pip had previously been able to communicate effectively about the children. Sean had put a stop to any contact between them.
On the Monday after the incident, Graeme saw a lawyer and asked her to file an urgent application for custody. He said he was worried sick about the effect of Sean's violence on the children.
His affidavit disclosed details of the incident. It also set out that Pip had always cared for the children fulltime and that Graeme had supported the family financially.
The court considered his application and directed that an urgent hearing be convened. The judge appointed a lawyer to represent the children's interests and to report before the hearing.
As soon as Pip got the papers she rang Graeme, arranging to meet at a cafe.
Tearfully, she assured him that she understood why he had filed for custody, but he was over-reacting to the incident. It had been a "one off", and she and Sean were having time apart anyway.
Pip said the youngest children would not cope without her.
Graeme was stuck. He didn't want to take the children from Pip. He had always valued her mothering and knew how close the children were to her. He gave Pip a hug and said he would think about it.
The lawyer for the children found that none was a great fan of Sean. They revealed that he often shouted at Pip, for seemingly no reason.
The oldest daughter reckoned Sean was a bit "psycho" about their Dad coming over, and that it had been "cool" with Mum and Dad before Sean came on the scene.
The middle child complained that Sean was always going on about how much it cost to feed them, and that made him feel "stink".
None of the children wanted to talk about their Mum being hurt, but the lawyer could see it had traumatised them. The children confirmed that Sean had moved some of his stuff out but was still popping in every now and again.
When the case came back to court, Pip's lawyer said the relationship with Sean was over. Counsel for the children was surprised to hear Graeme's lawyer then tell the judge that he was withdrawing his application for custody, that he had acted hastily and he did not really want to deprive the children of their mother.
But the judge had read the report filed by the counsel for the children and was only too happy to adjourn the matter at his request, keeping the lawyer involved because he continued to have concerns about the youngsters.
The children were referred to counselling through the court to help them deal with the trauma of seeing their mother hurt.
Some weeks passed and the children continued to live with Pip. She was fearful of any further court intervention at first and warned Sean to stay away.
He did not take too well to these exhortations and kept calling Pip, telling her he loved her, that he'd die without her, and on one occasion threatening to do himself in if she didn't see him.
The last threat got Pip moving because she could not bear to think she might be responsible for Sean's demise. She also secretly harboured strong feelings for him and hoped that things might get better for them.
Sean had told her he was seeing a counsellor, who said all his problems emanated from his relationship with his mother. Sean had since had a few angry confrontations with her, which Pip found worrying as his mother was elderly and unwell.
The counsellor had also told him that Pip and Graeme were too "tied in emotionally", which was one of the reasons he had pushed her. Pip was not certain she agreed but said nothing.
Swallowing her misgivings, she met Sean at a park on a day when Graeme had the children. At first he was loving and sweet. He had brought flowers, and seemed to be shaking with nerves. Pip tried to calm him , laughing gently at his shakes.
Sean turned, shouting at her that she had no idea how painful the enforced separation had been for him.
Pip said she had also missed him, and when he begged to come back she relented, making him promise that he would never hurt her again.
The children were downcast at the news of Sean's return. At first he was on model behaviour, and even helped round the house.
But one night Pip was late home from a PTA meeting and Sean was livid. She had popped into a friend's home for a drink after the meeting. She had forgotten to bring her cellphone and thought nothing of the quick catch-up.
But when she got home at nearly 11pm, Sean had worked himself up into an uncontrollable fury. Despite her son's presence, he pushed Pip to the floor when she came in the front door and kicked her hard, calling her a "slut" and leaving her moaning in the hall.
This time counsel for the children did not wait for their father to take action. He filed a report to the Department of Child, Youth and Family, asking that they urgently uplift the children from their mother's care.
In this case, the department did act with urgency and placed the children with their father, temporarily gaining custody and seeking a declaration that the children were in need of care and protection.
Pip would take time to get back on her feet and to obtain the crucial support she needed to get away from Sean, but until she did, the children had to be protected from exposure to Sean's violence to their mother.
Once at their father's home, they continued to see their mother, but only on a supervised basis until she had well and truly ditched Sean.
* Vivienne Crawshaw is a family law specialist.
<EM>Vivienne Crawshaw:</EM> Court steps in when things turn nasty
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